Mhystry.org

21/04/10 - hurt

2010-04-21T15:58:00.005+08:00

there are many reaons why people behave in certain ways, why they choose to do something against another person, why the purposely want to be 'bad' or 'ungracious' or self centered. these things, these issues usually stem from the root issue of hurts/past hurts, etc. the inability to forgive oneself and or another person for something that someone has done to you before. from this action, arises thoughts like "why should i be so ____ any more, no one treats me like that." or "why must i think for others, what have they done to deserve such treatment."

this series of events usually happen once a person has feelings of being mistreated, of themselves putting in much effort to make something work, but not getting what the expect in return, or just plainly from the way that they were brought up. considering this, a person can either choose to do something about it, like change themselves, accept that the choice is in their hands and make a conscious effort to do something about it, like release forgiveness and not hold grudges against people anymore, or they can choose likewise, to think that the world owes them, to think that they are superior to others. but to be honest, the latter choice will only bring you further down the road of being mistreated, having no one who is willing to put their trust in you. and you will end up hurting yourself more than any one else has ever did in the past.

the choice to break out of the cycle is your own. the first step is to accept the fact that you can do something about it. it's about how strong your willpower is. look at others as your example, never look down on oneself. the only time you'll fail is when you give up trying.

Proverbs 21:2 - 3 : All a man's ways are right to him, but the Lord weighs the Heart. To do what is right and just, is more acceptable to the Lord than sacrifice.

30/03/10 - yes yes. one of those blog posts.

2010-03-30T23:36:00.004+08:00

yes yes, i haven't been blogging for awhile, either because i was busy, or because i was lazy.

i was just thinking about it, partially cuz of the most recent Trybe run at BVSS(and all the previous ones that i volunteered at during the past few weeks), what exactly is my dream. also, during the past few weeks, i've consider other stuff as well, which are all,

Here.

1.// I wanna be a Professional/Wedding Photographer. that's like the ambition.

which i'm still pretty uncertain about how to get to the end point about this. hahaha. oh well, i'm trying, day by day i learn, trial and error, photography mags, etc. now all I need is like, a part time job as one that i can't seem to find. got offer please intro. haha.

2.// I wanna help people realise their own true potential, become better, improve their lives.

Like, it just brings me joy, looking at people succeed(some times more than others) in doing what they want to do in life. in reference to the $2 story, $2 in exchange for a life changed, i'm willing to pay that price. I'm still learning, of course, there are so many different kinds of people in this world, and i can't please them all, neither can i help them all, cuz some just don't want to be helped.

3.//Being a Christian(Actually, I prefer the Term Child of God. to me, the meaning is just different)

I don't give off the 'need to share the gospel with you' vibe. I always believed in balance, sincerity. to show others the Love of Christ, which He has given to Me, instead of just merely telling others about it. this one, is a long story. which i'd rather not elaborate on my blog due to my often conflicting views on this topic with most people.

4.//Toy Collecting Hobby

I notice i have a knack/or gift of God, for proving people wrong in things, especially their beliefs. for reasons unknown or unspecified. qoute Ethan "In my mind, people who are Transformers collectors usually don't get laid. But you have a girlfriend and I don't! How is that possible." ha. ha. ha. ha. i cannot explain this phenomenon to you. because i myself do not know the answer. but that aside, i've recently amassed a collection worth about close to a $1000 SGD worth of Transformers and Marvel figures. yes, it is alot of money, i know. but I do control my spending alot. one would wonder how i have money to spend on my dearest Vivian too. haha. but that too, is another story.

End.//Conclusion

well, welcome to the life of Henzy David. changing as the years go by, getting better. sometimes i hate my life, especially during the schooling days. but what i have now, i'm pretty thankful for them. i see that i'm really blessed by Father to have what i have now. well, i'd want to continue helping others, giving to people what i can give, after all, it's only when you give, that you can receive, receive not only more than what you give, but also to receive a certain joy, that is found only in giving. life's short, you don't have forever on Earth, so seek for the Eternal, instead of the Material, and once you make a choice, don't ever regret it. Don't think too much, don't worry too much. Always have a balance in the things you do. Always be thankful and appreciative. For these are the true keys to having a great life.

15/03/10 - a list of things to talk about

2010-03-15T23:33:00.003+08:00

i'm pretty grateful for today's Trybe West 4 cluster leadership training. even though i'm damn tired, it was pretty worth it, got to know new people, fun people, and got to see how different the culture is now as compared to back then while i was in sec 2. it's amazing, honestly.

well, i'm still damn tired, but i was just thinking about certain stuff about my own personal life. although there was an issue which surfaced recently, and i've come to accept that i have the problem and look for solutions for solving it. it was pretty much a problem about lack of self-esteem. r

Henzy David has fallen asleep at this current moment while typing the post.

picture added for Angela's sake.

10/03/2010 - if this is the case

2010-03-10T22:18:00.003+08:00

if this is the case, i'd rather be out of community.

"Post happy post, happy post, happy post." turns out that with this much negativity flowing through my views, me being in my current state should already be considered a miracle.

sidenote : "I love my Ipod-Amp-Setup. music's like, escapism."

seriously, i wonder where'd all this negative emotions came from. sigh. i'd create my own group, in vain.

04/03/10 - what of the brethren?

2010-03-04T23:11:00.002+08:00

you know, the feeling of a heavy heart sucks. with all the love and preparations for big events that are going on around me, i wonder when will my time come? sometimes i envy, i mean, don't we all? "humans desire that which they cannot attain." so i'm thinking, it's the same for all of us, that we're all seeking, desiring for the thing that eludes us the most. or maybe i'm just saying these things to comfort myself, cuz i just don't want to be alone.

i constantly ask myself this question, as if it's a right, "what of the brethren? what of henzy david?" when will i too experience that much joy which i see others experiencing? why do i always have to be the one behind the scenes. why do i choose to? why do i always portray myself as the one that spreads darkness over all good things? the rebel, the disobedient, the manipulator, the functionalist, the villain. i'd rather call myself an anti-hero. maybe it's a glitch in my system or programming. but that can't be right, God never makes mistakes. so what is it exactly? me myself? my own problem?

damn. they'll never know, they never did. either because i never gave them the chance to, which is the reason that most people will pick, or because they never tried hard enough. sigh. what to do? i don't even know. Father, could you help me out here? i think i'd better stop here. lest i once again sink deeper into the emo stuff.

27/02/10 - We've fallen, but we'll pick ourselves up.

2010-02-27T23:52:00.002+08:00

Dear God. thanks for everything. to be honest, if you didn't show me that, i wouldn't know that this is how far i've fallen. through the person closest to me, you showed me what i was before, what you made me to be. not this resolve-less, procrastinating, shell of a soul. i must admit though, i was blind to not be able to see. blinded by my own wit and gifting. giving up even without trying, but always covering it up by saying that there must be some other way around it. i've lost what i always believed in, to never give up on a particular way, to push forward all the way till the end.

i guess you could say that i lost my way, and now i've seen the light. the darkness is clearing, and the path that i must take, becoming clearer. i cannot continue on like this, a drifter. plainly just floating around everywhere, not taking ownership of anything for fear of responsibility and everything that comes with it. i must pick myself up. and the first step is awareness of your current plight.

thanks Vivian, bei er, without you, He couldn't have showed me what i'm doing now. i'm grateful to you for this. i know you'll continue to help me out where it's needed, after all, we do complete each other, where i'm lacking, you're not and vice versa. and yes, i do read your blog, in response to your blog post. haha.

i just thought i'd type it out before turning in. it's a good practice to jot down one's thoughts. thank you God, thanks Vivian. =)

15/02/10 - happy chinese new year.

2010-02-15T21:22:00.004+08:00

bah, humbug! you know, i actually wanted to water down the festive season once again. but well. Chinese New Year is different. in a sense, there is a tiny bit of the festive atmosphere. but still.

i've had ups and downs this CNY. cuz it's coupled together(get it? coupled? tgt? HAHAHA) with Valentine's day. so all we chinese out there can call this one, Valentines day burn.....

on the first morning of the first day of chinese new year, already bad start. had a small lil' argument with my dad in the morning about going back to M'sia. you know i dislike going there. but i kinda found the reason after going in. thank God that He allowed me to see a different light this year. i don't know why, but it was just different.

aside from that. yes, Vivian, my dearest bei er, i really do miss you alot. hell, i don't even know how much is enough to describe to you this irritating feeling of missing you yet not being able to see you, contact you or even talk to you. Thank God again that He provided the internet connection over there at your aunt's place. haha.

CNY loot was good. now i have funds. hahaha. time to go on a long awaited good date with you. haha. waiting for awhile more to convert my RM into SGD, then go on a spree at China Square. lol. provided that i have stuff to spree on. not forgetting to save money. haha. aye. that's all for now.

this whole period has really allowed me to see how much we really love each other. hasn't it? it's good. it's like, He purposely did this so that we'd see it. so i'm thankful to Him. and also thankful to Him for keeping me and you safe, esp last night whr i almost fell sick. haha, after the tomyam fish and coke with chivas. haha. i know you'll probably hit me on the head after reading this. haha. but yea. love you Vivian.

for the other readers of this blog, my apologies. esp to Jasper and gang. i know you need not see all the written affection and etc. but whatever. haha. my bad. i really had to do it. haha. Happy CNY to the rest of ya. hope that you too shall have abundance of Red Packets which are fat with funds. haha.

24/01/10 - i just realised.

2010-01-24T23:54:00.002+08:00

There are two things i discovered today.

One: Making tutu kueh is an art form.

only certain people that are trained in this art form can successfully accomplish making a proper tutu kueh that doesn't fall apart or stick to the cloth while it is being steamed. interestingly, the more generous people also gain more loyal customers. me being one of them. haha.

you never knew, but it wasn't until recently that i started liking this tutu kueh thing. well, thank God for giving them the idea of coming up with a chocolate flavoured one. haha.

Two: Some Singaporeans have no idea what a rat is.

i was walking to the mrt station just now and there was this cute little rat running around in circles near the bike stands. amused, i stood there and watched as the rat continued to go round and round in circles until it saw me and ran into the bushes. two 'couples' walked by, the first one, two girls, were commenting on how cute the small rat was, and how it would be quite ugly when it grew bigger(i beg to differ). the second one, a guy and the girl - the guy said, "Hamster." the girl i couldn't hear. but holy crap. hamster? hamster and rat very far off know. i was like, you don't know what's a rat man. lol, where got hamster so loooong one.

lol. jeez. for the love of God.

23/01/10 - the best is yet to come

2010-01-23T03:16:00.003+08:00

i've really been wondering about myself alot lately. my purpose, my life and all. seriously. when's all this gonna end? what am i really here for?

God says "The best is yet to come."

i'm just gonna be faithful, and trust Him on this one. as much as i worry so much.

there are signs, as "insignificant" or "unrelated" as they are. the best is really, yet to come.

a New Jetpower Optimus Prime set to be released by Takara Tomy, along with a new Leader Megatron Figure. The Leader Class Starscream Figure, and of course, the Mitsouka Orochi, Alternity Starscream coming on the 29th of May.

Thomas's Birthday, Mine, Project Carnivore, CNY. etc. what else isn't there to celebrate about.

i just wanna live like a normal human. hah, i guess i can't, can i? there's more shit for me to handle, then again, it could be a sign of how much He sees that i can achieve.

give me strength. i'm gonna need it.

06/01/10 - first post of the year and i'm wondering again

2010-01-06T05:38:00.002+08:00

what time is it now? oh, oh. 5.39am.

well, it turns out that i can't seem to fall asleep somehow, and ended up looking through all the previous letters, cards and wedding invitations that people have given to me for the past 5 years. looking through them brought me back to those times at bukit merah, when service was on Saturdays at 3.30pm. where we'd always gather after service and chill out at the hawker center, where we celebrated birthdays right there and then, where everyone that we knew would be around us, and we all would be a close knit group, and i still thought that 'Magic box' was a place at boat quay next to the Singapore river where there was a pool table and sorts. coined "the golden era" by Jasper, those were the good days.

among those, promises of always being there for me, that standard line of growing strong in Christ, and birthday wishes of multiple sorts. and there were things that made me smile, like "strangest guy I've ever met." from Keith, my words and actions always being inappropriate but making sense from Ivan, "Interesting and weird chap" from Ben, and this make-shift good luck card for wishing me luck for my O levels from Huiying, Yong Teck, Sooyin, Yuewei, MingHao and Maggie from Y.I. And it seems like Ivan hasn't changed, still telling me that it's not good to get into relationships when you're young, and he's still doing it now. not that it changes anything.

then there was my baptism, and all the cards related were talking about how I'd grow up and mature, and become a great man for Christ, how proud people were of me for taking the step of faith, how even people that i weren't close to or knew nuts about then would just even contribute to the card. honestly, while i read those cards, i really wonder how many expectations have i crushed beneath my heel, how many people have i disappointed. i guess i didn't turn out the way they would have expected me to become.

and i do wonder, what was their impression of me then? how has that changed? do they look down on me now? do they feel that i'm hopeless? have they given up on changing me? have they abandoned me to be done in by my own actions? what happened Henzy David? what went wrong? where's the fault line? i honestly don't know. it just seemed like one day, i woke up and everything became the way it is now.

reminiscence. those good times are gone. our moment is over. honestly, i'd rather be living my coming days being positive, looking at the bright side, enjoying every moment that i have for what it is, for it's true potential. there are many things troubling my heart, God knows. things i can't do anything about, things that make me worried, things that make me consider.

i don't even know how to end this blog post. haha. my my. sigh. look at the time. it's already 6. there's no need to regret Henzy David. Que Sera Sera, whatever will be will be. i will leave this world with a smile on my face. i will not live in regret, and for all the things that i do, i'll do it to my fullest. enjoy life, it's short, but it can be sweet. if you know how to twist it to your advantage.

01/01/10 - a new chapter

2010-01-01T04:17:00.002+08:00

Duskfall: as the new year begins, what are your thoughts brethren?

Me: well, its been a great year, but what i'm hoping for is a greater year ahead. this year has been good, full of ups and downs, but it surely has been good. and i really want to give thanks to God for certain things that have happened over the year. it's been an eventful '09, break ups, new relationships, new revelations. but what i really want to do for 10' is really to begin another new chapter in my life. this year, what i want to do is to really get things right. for those who's walk is righteous, are those which God will be with. because i know that in this current relationship that i'm having with Vivian, God really has to be the center of it. otherwise, things are really gonna fall apart. we've come to far not only by our own efforts, but also by the blessings of the father up above.

another thing that i just really wanna get past this year, get into the next year of studies and just finish up everything, get my diploma. seems like it shows to many that i'm not really putting in much effort for my work. well, guess it's time to change that. haha, with such a hardworking and always-striving-for-excellence-girlfriend, you're bound to be affected.

there's just one notable that i'm really considering. for the past 2-3 weeks, Darkness has really been the main topic of discussion for me. indeed, the Darkest Nights give way to the Brightest Days. this indeed is true. without Darkness, there can be no Light. this is also true, as the strongest Light source can only be seen when all the other lights fade to darkness. but for me, hiding in the darkness has taken it's toll. as much as i enjoy the shade, its tiring to keep up the act. so there's the consideration. step out into the Light and let all see what i truly am, or just remain where i am and remain as i am. i shall decide this soon.

Duskfall: it seems you've made up most stuff in your mind, that is good. very well. looks like you've got it all covered brethren. you should be able to make it through this year again. i'm here, as always, if you need me.

Me: the realization that Humans ultimately find solace and comfort in knowing that they are not alone. this is a powerful notion, it gives them motivation, a source of strength and courage, something to live for.

Duskfall: indeed, it is a notion that serves you well. knowing that those who have been beside you for so long, those that stand by your side, truly appreciate you. that gives you strength doesn't it. the strength to pull yourself together and not allow yourself to fall apart. but i guess we shall cover this topic another time. it's getting late. we still have much to do later. rest well brethren, Happy New Year.

23/11/09 - a believe christmas came early. AFA

2009-11-24T02:57:00.000+08:00

i believe Christmas came early for Henzy David.

my recent endeavors to Sunshine Plaza, China Square and most importantly, AFA 09' has brought Christmas early for Henzy David. scoring the loot of one Buster Optimus Prime and a set of metal transformers insignia stickers from AFA, i still wonder why am i still considering the Final Fantasy figures by PlayArts.

it's been an exciting time exploring these places and just looking out for the stuff that you're looking for, finding them there, discovering that the prices they fetch are much cheaper than expected. yes, and Vivian would know the expression on my face when i have either found something i like, for example an exclusive figure or a prototype, like the Defender Optimus Prime, set for release like, next year along with Leader Starscream, or am just admiring or considering the details on the piece.

many thanks to you my dear for the invite to AFA, otherwise i would have been able to lay hands on the buster prime this early. haha.

no doubt, with good news, definitely comes bad news. there's been a few situations happening recently, and only today have i found out the real reason for. admittedly, it's abit personal to be blogging it up here. but i know, or at least, it has been revealed to me what exactly the cause is. and i am dealing with it now. i don't want it to cause my downfall. i guess you could call it taking things for granted, or even say, being overconfident in one's own abilities, in short, pride has surfaced. time to deal with it.

i am Henzy David, but Henzy David has to consider the factors that have made him what he is today, and has to treasure them, respect them, and learn to give thanks and listen. otherwise, the people around him wouldn't do the same to him. another thing is knowing that the reason as to why something ticks you off, can be said to be due to the reason that you yourself have not dealt with that certain matter inside yourself.

guess that's all for tonight. gotta go sleep. it's 3.06am. haha.

for pictures of the Transfomers ROTF Buster Optimus Prime, check out my Facebook TF gallery.

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=98903&id=604810635&ref=mf

cheers.

05/11/09 - does anyone really take me seriously?

2009-11-05T23:59:00.002+08:00

you were right Min. i'd really be affected by it.

does anyone really take me seriously?! gah

2cor3:5

04/11/09 - i admire thee [23:42PM] Oh come on Henzy David, do your work

2009-11-04T19:21:00.004+08:00

i admire thee, you who stand at the MRT gantry with handbag in hand, furiously tapping your entire bag on the ezlink scanner whilst a queue line builds behind thee. the red light flashes in vain, as your ignorance or pride creates an angry mod behind you. such is the ease of removing the or wallet or purse from your bag, yet your folly is that your sloth overwhelms you. i wonder what goes through your mind, whether you consider those rushing for time behind you, or do you sincerely believe the whole world revolves around you.

i admire thee, you who gather in the masses. spouting nonsense for no apparent reason, speaking words that make no sense in the sentences that you use. shouting loudly as though the one next to you is deaf. using gestures and languages that degrade the other party. your rebellious souls are worthy of admiration, however your cause, i cannot say the same. for yours is fear and trembling, your hope to be noticed, celebrated, worshipped as king, ambitious, but selfish.

no, do not get me wrong, i do not look down on thee. it is just a consideration, what truly goes through your minds?

the Singaporean culture is very self centered. thinking only for themselves, not considering the feelings of others around them. thinking that everything revolves around them and everyone around them should serve them because they have to. think again. the more you treat others nicely, the more others will do the same to you. Do onto others what you want others to do onto you.

[added at 23:42PM] new topic

i've been blog hopping and facebooking when i should be doing my work. yea, no doubt i've done abit of stuff and searched for work related stuff and what not, but it's not really honest work. i don't know, i'm stressed. i don't feel like doing my homework and stuff. and it's the last stretch. another week more to the end of school for this year. and then i can reset myself and finally sit down and do what i need to do, sort myself out and get ready for next year.

stress hits me every night the moment i lie in bed, wanting to go to sleep. telling me, i've still got stuff to finish. when's the due date, when's the due date. damnit. but i saw this little thing on adeline's blog, and i just decided that i really had to post all this up here cuz if i didn't, i wouldn't start working again. need motivation, feel damn sian. argh. irritance.

"trying your best; that's whats most important (:

as long as it's not the end of the race, you still have a chance to win." - quoted from adel's blog

i've come across forms of these words before, i myself have used them to motivate others too. but the things is that, you know, motivating others and motivating yourself are two different things on a totally different level from each other.

cool it. calm down brethren.
come on, you can do this shit. finish it up. clear up the mess. finish the level.
God help me. i'm near my wits end, my energy level's depleting rapidly.

i guess this is what it feels like when all the tiredness and sleep debt catches up to you huh.

02/11/09 - cold weather gives reasons to snuggle.

2009-11-02T23:59:00.006+08:00

there's much that i want to talk about tonight. and the good news is, i've got it all in my head. let's begin then shall we.

1.//Henzy David is Happy
why? because he's seen the latest updates to the leader class Starscream figure of the Revenge of the Fallen Movie line, and is very very pleased. i'm admiring the amount of effort put into the design of these figures, and boy am i pleased. the amount of detail is awesome. these figures are real beauties. haha. if you're interested, you can ask me, i'll pass you some links.

2.//Injury after Injury
yes, i am injured. physically. i don't know whether people will believe it, or just thinking that i'm trying to chao keng. but yes, i have a injured right foot for dunno what reason, a sore throat that seems to be healing and a left thumb that had a dunno-how-many-inch TV sit on it for a mere 10 seconds leaving it numb for 3 days already... damn it. but the thumb's healing, the foot is another story. still wondering what's going on with it.

3.//Stupid Retarded Lousy Plotless Movie
called Jennifer's Body. my rating? 0/5 stars. yeap, you see it right, a big, hmm maybe not that big, fat zero. walked out of the cinema feeling like some retarded guy who went to watch a dumb movie. lol. wayne la, your fault! shouldn't listen to wayne's advices and just gone and watch something that i really wanted to watch, like, This Is It. and yes, for those who just want to watch the movie for megan fox, i have totally no interest whatsoever in megan fox. zero. in fact, the movie kinda spoilt my impression of her. so much better in TF.

this is it, trailer.

though i don't really have much interest in MJ too. it's just, so much more, cool.

4.//Left with 1 more week of School
and i'm rushing up all my projects so that i can at least have something to show. even though i've had a tough time with schoolwork due to some particular reasons back then that i had to deal with. i wonder why my own life always has something appearing when there's school. it'd be so much better during the holidays. lol. but oh well, important issues will always be important issues. i have a few more projects to go. all the way to the finish line Duskfall. don't lose heart.

5.//Love the Cold Weather
because it creates opportunities to snuggle up to the person you love. lol. aside from that, it also prevents much amounts of perspiration that makes you smell bad, even to yourself. though it is a give an take, but how heavy can an umbrella be? haha.

that's all i guess. haha. sometimes, i wish i can just put all my feelings up here. but that'd be a major turn off for most people. haha. keeping all the emotions inside of me is really a tough job. now, i'm hungry. =S that's all for now folks. stay tuned.

29/10/09 - home is where the heart is

2009-10-29T01:51:00.002+08:00

Home is where the Heart is.

this phrase is has been given new meaning today. to me at least. home is where the heart is. where my heart is is with God and with Vivian. you ask, how can i be in two places, well, while Vivian can be in two places or be where God is, God can be anywhere at anytime, and can be where Vivian is. so yea, that prolly explains most stuff to you people out there who just want a logical explanation to most stuff. ye of little faith!

indeed, there's been many changes in the past few months, and good changes. i'm really starting to rely and seek God more. mostly because of the appearance of Vivian Ma in my life. haha, yes, i'm really proud of you my dear, for the things that you've gone through, learnt and persevered through. thank God(meant like an instruction, not a sigh of relief like something bad just ended), for these things have really made you a better person. =) haha. and yes, because of that, i do love you more.

i think you guys are probably sick of hearing this or out there complaining in your hearts like why is Henzy David doing this again, like PDA PDA!!! lol. but whatever. I love Vivian Ma!!

yup. it's been a wonderful day, Praise the Lord! something funny happened just now, haha. while i received a piece of good news for tml, so i was gonna exclaim praise to God, put halfway through doing that, a cat appeared behind me. it sorta went like this, i was going "Hallelu....(turns around--sees cat) uh!" haha. stopped to pat the cat. haha. it was one of those moments.

this is a shoutout. Anyone with Joo Chiat out there. i need one joo chiat. haha. for those playing the McDonalds SG Monopoly. haha.

God is good. He has been faithful. i Praise you Father, for all you've given and blessed me with. my heart just wants to sing praises to you. =) Hallelujah.

P.S. I Love You Vivian Ma! =P

26/10/09 - God is Fair

2009-10-26T22:19:00.002+08:00

God is Fair. because to whom much has been given, much is required.

19/10/09 - dealing with sian.

2009-10-19T23:52:00.002+08:00

recently. i've not been myself. or rather, i haven't had much control of myself outside of my relationship.

yes. i've not been going to school proper, i've been more vulgar than usual, i've been losing control more often. but now, i've found the cause. and it all comes to a stop right here. no longer will the brethren move down this path, for more hurt than joy does it bring him.

yea, everyone goes through it once or more in your lifetime. a period of time whereby you're sick and tired of living. when things get too routine and boring and you bring the 'sian' feeling everywhere you go even though you don't want to. it's inevitable, it just tags along. this instance in life too is inevitable. we must all go through it, we must all face it, but moreover, we must all overcome it.

letting it overrule your life would be disastrous. it's time we find something to do, it may not be a new thing. it may just be something that we haven't done for awhile. it may just be something that you love doing but don't have the time. whatever, so long as it brings you joy, it fits the bill. for through that joy, will one receive the strength to move on in life. and that's where things start to kick up again.

i admit, i'm in no position to say all this. but i know the reason why i can openly declare this is because i'm gonna do it.

let's finish up what's left of our unfinished business this year. take a long break, and start getting serious once the new year begins. i've wasted enough time. it's time to take the next step and initiate the next phase in growing up. living.

07/10/09 - my internal conversation

2009-10-07T23:59:00.003+08:00

Duskfall: what's wrong brethren? why the insecurity?

Me: i'm not sure. i'm not even sure where to start.

Duskfall: just begin, where ever.

Me: i don't know, it's just. there's so many things to consider. and i don't want to have this insecure feelings. but these few days, all the feelings are just so messed up. the sadness, the considerations, the despair and disappointment, the wondering, the fear. i really just want to get over this and move on with life. i don't want my old life to keep creeping back into the present.

Duskfall: well, it was you who chose to fight the insecurities in your heart. knowing that you have to overcome it in order to move on. i know what you're doing here. i know your purpose. but you know brethren, insecurity cannot be fought with determination alone. insecurity can only be triumphed by trust. trust coupled together with assurance works best. but without the assurance, you can only rely on trust to pull you through.

Me: i understand. but that's where the problem comes in. i know i'm not the kind who trusts easily. looking back and having gone through that many pains in my life. pains that may be small to others, but significant enough for me to be hurt. pains that seem insignificant, but push me to invoke a barrier of defence. the exact same barrier which prevents me from putting my trust in people. the exact same barrier that i need to bring down in order for me to move on.

Duskfall: you know. it's simple. just trust in the people around you. Trust in God, trust in Vivian, trust in your friends, the ShadowHearts, Jasper, etc. you know the list.

Me: i don't know. i'm just falling apart at the seams.

Duskfall: you know. you've already come this far to talk about this here. to share with people your heart and feelings. that shows that you don't want to be alone anymore. that you've had enough of the misconceptions and misunderstanding that people have about you because of your way of doing things. that honestly, you really want to be open and you really want to set out into the light.

Me: i wish i really knew what i was thinking. i miss her. i wish she was here so that there'd be someone to comfort me. but yet, i know that i can't rely on her, she too has her own issues to deal with.

Duskfall: you wonder why we think so much don't you. come on Brethren, pull yourself together. don't let these distractions stop you. you know the devil can't get to her, she's strong. and that's why he's here. targeting you. all these feelings are just distractions.

Me: i know. i know. i know how it works. it just that i feel i need someone to encourage me, to push me forward. i can only do so to a certain extent. which consumes energy, and my energy levels are currently low. as much as i give off the impression that i seem full of energy and what not. you know, i think the pain's starting to set in. the pain from it all, from the hurtful words and actions. to the sarcasm and irritating comments. i guess they're finally starting to take their toll on me.

Duskfall: ah, you see. here we have the situation. it's a risk brethren. you choose to be open about it, the pain will flow in. you choose to neglect it, it will be kept at bay. but being open has more privileges as you already discovered.

another thing about you brethren. is you never let others take the blame for these kind of things, matters relating to the heart. you're always trying to be the hero. trying to live up to the name that you placed on yourself, the name of the Silent Guardian. the guardian who chooses to sacrifice for God knows what purpose.

you're always having the mindset that so long as there's one to take the pain, others needn't suffer. so you willingly put yourself on the plate. don't do this by yourself. don't carry all the burden by yourself. you've got to learn to let it go. to share it. you're one man, you can't do this by yourself.

Me: i know that. but i just don't want to say it out. i just don't want to trouble others. i don't want them to suffer with me.

Duskfall: you need an outlet. you fear letting her know all this because you don't know the effect it might have on her. you fear she'd blame herself, knowing that some words did exactly what it was meant to do, regardless of the intentions. you know that you don't want to let her know all these because you know her current situation, her energy levels, her schedule and issues. but ask yourself brethren, does she want to know. does she want to care for you?

Me: ....

Duskfall: Embrace it brethren. Fight it, while embracing it. you can. You won't allow it to deter you from your dream. you won't allow it to stop proving to Father you sincerity in the bargain and decision you made with Him. you may believe that it's a necessary sacrifice for the greater good of others. but ask yourself, what good does it do to you. how long more can you hold on, it's been 5 years now. you know you're reaching breaking point. it's time my friend, time to let it go. time to live life for yourself, for what you really want to do. for the things you really want.

You are not weak by expressing yourself in this manner brethren. in fact, it is those who are able to do so that deserve respect and admiration. for these people truly portray who they really are, and not hide behind a mask of deceit, mock-strength and courage, and false-identity. so you have my admiration and respect brethren. be strong. Father's always with you. and remember Vivian. right now, you're not alone anymore, you've got her too you know. i'm sure she's willing, so long as you be truthful about everything, your feelings, your hurt, your thoughts, etc.

come on brethren. take heart! the courage of man will not fail this day. you will overcome this.

Me: I...

Duskfall: i know your heart. you don't have to say a thing. now go, accomplish your task set before you. for the glory of the Father.

05/10/09 - the issue of insecurity

2009-10-05T23:23:00.002+08:00

i now see why we have to go through this much to be together, and not me just falling in love with you back then when we first met. i don't think that it'd be this good if we just got together at that point of time. it just wouldn't have been the same. i now see that it was all God-planned. i now understand the reasons and i thank God for them, in fact, i praise Him that He had put us through all those trials and tribulations before we ended up here. it just wouldn't be the same.

it wouldn't be the same if i didn't go through the previous failed relationships. without them, i wouldn't have learnt the things that were taught to me through the pain. i wouldn't be what i am today. i feel, maybe i'd still be as possessive and selfish, as stubborn and as willful, as impatient and as immature as i was before. and that wouldn't be good, would it.

i wouldn't know what the true meaning of treasuring and trusting a person is. i wouldn't understand how to give others space and time. i wouldn't be able to love you just as much without understanding how much it means to me if that love was taken away. it is true, that sometimes, you won't know how to treasure something unless it's taken away from you. that's why i Praise the Lord for the pain. i Praise the Lord for the things that i've gone through, for the things that i've lost. for without losing them, i wouldn't have been able to treasure you like how i do now.

and yes. i do thank you. those broken relationships. as painful or as screwed up and a failure they might have been. they have taught me things that could never be found without going through one. so i thank you, i wish not to name names, but you know who you are. i thank God for you.

as is in all situations, nothing is perfect. we're all striving hard, ignoring the distractions and holding on to that which is important. i guess, my issue now is still insecurity, the doubts that arise over time. but just as i told you, you reminded me that this insecurity is a distraction, and i shouldn't rely on my logic to produce the trust, i should just trust and believe.

thank you, thank all of you who have been a part of my life. for through these experiences have i learnt things that are priceless. through these hardships, have i truly been made into what i am today. and i stand in awe that He planned all this even before i existed.

for truly, only in the Darkness will you be able to find your True Guiding Light.

I'll be seeing you for the rest of my life right? haha. that's our promise.

04/10/09 - tired again. lol.

2009-10-04T23:25:00.003+08:00

i really wonder sometimes, how i really get through the day like this. haha. never thought of it huh? i don't give off the impression that i'm actually tired like no one's business, but still do things as though i've got the whole tank full of energy in me.

bloody hell, thank God la. damn it. seriously, i think i'm gonna die of exhaustion someday if this continues on. lol.

and yes, for the benefit of those who don't already know, Vivian Ma is my girlfriend. lol. since there seems to be some doubts about it going around. lemmie just be open about it and confirm it.

right, lemmie go take a nap. haha.

27/09/09 - Chasing the Dream

2009-09-27T11:50:00.005+08:00

You can only persevere, when you're passionate about something.

so here i am, chasing the dream. just my own simple dream. but truth be told, God, is it difficult. it's difficult knowing that you know the answers for the questions, the solutions for most of the problems. but just that you can't do anything to help it.

i know what i really want this time, and this is really it. that's why i'm not giving up no matter what people have told me, well, at least those against it. i don't know, honestly. this is the first time i've felt so strongly about something, so convicted that this is exactly the thing that i want and require, so much so that i wanna do stuff to prove to God that that is exactly what it is. even though He's offered me the easy way out, i choose to stand by this decision, to take that hard way, the path filled with darkness.

"If it's not real you can't hold it in your hands, you can feel it with your heart. And i won't believe it. But if it's true you can see it with your eyes, oh even in the dark. And that's where i want to be." - excerpt from "Brick by Boring Brick" by Paramore.

I'm holding on, I'm not gonna give up, come hell or high water, let the earth crumble to dust, I'm gonna finish what i started, because that's what i'm really passionate about. through the pain and disappointments, the tiredness of striving. i'll stand by you, support you, if it's the last thing that i do on this earth.

"....I love you more than Life itself."

don't limit yourself, just let yourself go. open your heart, and i'll show you the joy of things around you. stick with me and i'll set you free. stick with me, and i promise that i'll be there, to protect you from all the darkness that comes in this life.

to God be the glory, for ever and ever.

24/09/09 - the Darkness of this world.

2009-09-24T11:22:00.002+08:00

in this world of Darkness, we all have to be the Light. the Light that withstands all odds and overcomes all hardship. the Light that guides the way, that reveals the truth. Believing in oneself, trusting in the one that provides.

i'm not one to blog senselessly, but that's exactly what i'm doing now. this blog post, aside from the first paragraph, is pretty essence-less, substance-less.

23/09/09 - to feel, your amazing love

2009-09-23T23:44:00.002+08:00

To Feel, Your Amazing Love.

one week passes and my whole life changes. doesn't that deserve a Praise to God. in fact, it deserves more than that. thanks God, for the miracle you've given me in life. there's honestly too many words to say to the extend whereby i just don't know what to say to thank you. so yea God, this is Henzy David, just dropping by to give my thanks to the Father of the Heavenly lights, and to the one who's blessed me with the great gift, or rather, the greatest gift that i could ever receive in my whole damned life - Tsubaki. thanks God. =)

well, guess that's it. i'm starting to get right my life, schoolwork and etc. damned, really need money. haha. CALLING ALL PHOTOGRAPHERS! need lobang. lol. pm me at my tagboard.

anyways, that's all for now.

Duskfall cometh.

19/08/09 - reconsiderations

2009-08-19T23:35:00.002+08:00

reconsiderations. seriously?

but of course. sometimes in life, we need to stop and look back upon the choices that you've made. i sincerely wonder. or maybe i shouldn't. cuz it's making me think too much.

have i been making the right decisions? have i been truthful to myself about the things that i've done and am doing? do i tally with the things that i say?

it pains us. honestly. to be unsure, to be confused. it pains us because it doesn't allow us to be sure, to be confident. and that will affect my abilities to plan and make choices.

maybe, just maybe it's supposed to be this way. so that i'll give up. and really rely on God. maybe. i'm not sure. but whatever it is, we hate being unsure.

sigh. tragic.

Decepticons, begin your assault!

13/09/09 - God's sense of humour

2009-08-13T23:02:00.004+08:00

I believe God has a funny sense of Humour. one fateful day 2 years ago, i was sitting in a class in Nanyang Poly for Electronic computer communications engineering. 2 years later, i'm sitting in a class learning about programming and html, knowing almost nuts about it though i have already have some idea what it is about.

well, it's a new class. i'm still adjusting to the changes, but i kinda like it here. the class like got a little club house thing, a room totally for ourselves, and the new people are kinda friendly too. which is a plus. for a moment i thought i was gonna have to survive myself for the next 2 odd years or so. guess i won't have to now. i'm just kinda worried for tomorrow, since i wasn't at last friday's lesson. i didn't exactly know what's going on. haha. oh well. enough about school huh.

on another note. it seems that i'm getting a little pissed off with my life. so i kinda thought about things. what i wanna do with my life.
~~1) I wanna go into Audio. and focus most of my work into Audio-related stuff. since i like good high quality music that much.~~
~~2) I wanna try to hybridize the Photography element into that too. i know it's gonna cost a bomb. but most of my hobbies cost bombs.~~
3) I wanna continue to further myself in Transformerology. or maybe just widen the scope into just plainly collecting toys, repainting toys etc etc etc.
4) I wanna change and improve myself so that i can support and help people.
5) I wanna develop a closer relationship with God.

seriously, i pray that i can do it. i pray for confidence in myself. i pray for myself to be able to love again. i pray that i'm not so confused anymore. i pray that i'll be able to have compassion and a heart for people and the children of God. i pray that i'll be able to uphold my morals. i pray that sooner or later, i'll be able to be a pillar of strength for the person i love. i pray that i won't lose heart anymore. and i pray that i won't become bored or indifferent with life anymore.

Life's too short and fragile to just waste it away worrying and wondering what's gonna come next. it's time to take charge of my own life. while maintaining that balance of God in it. so that i won't become solely the master of my life. but have the capabilities to balance it, doing what He wants for me, and what i want that doesn't go against his plan.

Mhystry. Mhystry is non-existent. neither is all of my other selves or entities. there's only one Henzy David. who goes by the name Duskfall. who is in charge of the name of Mhystry for whatever use that name may be to him. it's about time i stopped hiding myself underneath some veil and a defense mechanism. my lies and deceit have to come to an end one day.

07/08/09 - when we consider

2009-08-07T23:55:00.002+08:00

Compassion, Love, Patriotism, Sentiments. I've never been much for them, never really had the heart to consider them. but we wonder, what is our life becoming without them? have we truly become indifferent towards the needs of others aside from the Close Ones, the [.//ShadowHearts], the circle, the friends? have we gone cold and took for granted this country we are in?

I took a break off the Day of His Power. couldn't concentrate ever since the background music of "Home" was being played, then it had to hit me when Pastor preached about being compassionate or something for SG. which led me to one of those times whereby i just phase out of society and take a quiet high place for myself. considering not only those things, considering nothing, considering to the extent whereby we were not certain of what we really were considering.

It led me to think, how have i come this far? What and who has given me the grace and blessing to get me so far in life? how is my view of the world now? and strangely, when 8.22pm comes on sunday night, will i be apart or will i once again phase out.

Who do i really want? What do i really want?

we know, we'll find it. don't give up, fight on. it's not ended yet. come hell or high water, we're gonna win this. By any means necessary.

Accustomed to Pain. A Curse and A Blessing.

06/08/09 - to begin again

2009-08-06T22:35:00.002+08:00

"We Have It In Our Power To Begin The World Again." - Thomas Paine

How many of us understand the fragility of things in this world. The fragility of newness, of relationships, of yourselves. this world and all that is within it is so fragile, the smallest shift, the finest twitch would change the outcome of the timeline, of the future.

So what does it mean then to begin again, to pick up the pieces and carry on? In fact, how does one even do so, with that much pressure being put onto us in this current society. Disregarding that point, one would also have to contend with his or her own heart and desires, memories and interactions. How even one of the smallest things can affect a person in such a big manner.

When the Past slowly creeps back into your present, what would you do? How would you control it?

be strong, take courage. it's not over yet. this will not pull you down.

11/07/09 - two kinds of christian

2009-07-11T23:59:00.002+08:00

there are two kinds of Christians in this world. the ones who ask and the one who just follows. which are you? the ones that just follow are the ones that ask "why do you question this? it's written", "why question the leader, for they know what they're doing", "why worry so much, just do as you're told".

the one who asks, are usually the people who gain more in the end. their faith is strengthened by questions thought to disprove faith, questions thought to be anti-christ, questions that may stumble others. but don't get me wrong, i've got nothing against those who follow. they may be fanatical at times, but i've got nothing against them at all.

all those who seek shall find. but if you don't seek, you won't get anything at all. our God has given us grace, thus we should be fearless with tact. nothing is impossible with Christ. and i mean nothing, if only you ask. after all, the shall is not in "ask and you shall be given, seek and you shall find, knock and the door shall be opened" for nothing. and may i remind some of you. shall is not may, shall is will, shall is definite.

10/07/09 - it ain't time yet

2009-07-10T23:25:00.001+08:00

i don't think i'm ready yet. not at this time. 2 relationships in 2 years took a hell lot out of me. even though one totally threw me to hell and back and the other just seemed to be perfect for awhile, but that's where it ended, awhile. it seems like the perfect one isn't coming soon. well, least if she's here right now, i wouldn't know what i'd say to her to not make her feel awkward. haha. yea. what to do, guess i do have some expectations for my girlfriend after all. since the next one that i'm looking for is liable to be my life partner.

in the meantime, i do have much more to do. work on myself per se, my self control at times, my rage, learning to forgive others and stuff like that. filling my time up with stuff, hanging out with friends. getting closer with close friends and getting to know more about the people around me(which is why i asked if there was any other thing that i could ask you out for, if you know i'm referring to you. =P/joking manner). well. it takes awhile to mend a broken heart. especially when you tried to mend the broken heart by making another choice that ends up breaking your heart again.

i just wanna thank God that He's been good to me during this period of time. blessing me with so many people(okay, maybe not that many) to confide in and provide counsel. blessing me with friends, loved ones, success and favor in school and work, transformers, the list goes on i guess.

and i guess it's time to end here. haha. God bless. love the Lord with all your heart, for the fear of the Lord is the beginning of all wisdom.

09/07/09 - what i've done

2009-07-09T22:51:00.003+08:00

its been awhile. lemmie do an update of what i've done in my absence.

1)Watched Transformers Revenge of the Fallen 3 times. EngWah, GV and Cathay
2)Became an overnight Transformers fan.
3)Rapidly increased my TF collection
4)Passed Foundation Year, finally!
5)Formed the [.//ShadowHearts]
6)Worked at a Comic Shop
7)Built a better relationship with my church mates and God
8)Tied up a few loose ends in church
9)Felt Happy
10)Enjoyed myself

but now, i can really just enjoy myself till my school starts. now i'm doing a few little plans, like for example, clean up the mess in my room and go buy new furniture for my room. haha.

as much as Jasper would tell me, where got time, i think i may want to still further increase my collection. see how la, depends. still need to eat and save money for future use. haha. after all, i believe i've "transformed" brother Wesker too. hahaha.

all glory to God.

for all who might be interested to view my TF collection, it's on my facebook profile.

22/06/09 - our little predicament

2009-06-22T20:03:00.002+08:00

now we're in a little predicament.

a few more days left for us to redeem ourselves in our schoolwork area. and we haven't really done much. we now we can't give up at this point of time, we know we surely cannot stay at our current state. but we don't got much motivation to move on and push ourselves forward.

we're losing, even if we keep telling ourselves not to give up, we just want to, like there's nothing much to life anymore.

20/06/09 - the Transformers Wishlist.

2009-06-20T23:31:00.002+08:00

a leader class animated figure for $50.
or 4 deluxe class animated figures for $60.

i think i'll choose the latter. haha. or if they have more different choices other than lugnut or starscream for the voyagers which are at $20, i'll definitely get them. haha. i think i'm more of a fan of the Transformers Animated Series than the TF movies. we'll, it seems to be because of the quality and likeness too.

today was the Random Food Trail, as i'm going to keep referring to it that way. regardless. overall rating for the outing should be around a 4 star over 5 star rating. not bad i'd say. i'm impressed that i'd make a few good calls this time round as a group leader. but then again, overconfidence in my own navigating abilities can cost. haha. which i had to learn the hard way. so, moral, confidence is good, overconfidence, needless to say.

3 more days to Revenge!

19/06/09 - Fate rarely calls upon us at a moment of our choosing

2009-06-19T01:24:00.004+08:00

"Fate rarely calls upon us at a moment of our choosing." -Optimus Prime

some might mistake me for promoting transformers on my blog the very moment i return to blogging. but truth is that, that is a half-truth.

indeed, fate rarely does call upon us at a moment which we choose. never, or very seldom do we require to do things life changing and we're ready for it. it's like the theory, or common term, stepping out of your comfort zone[although highly over used(feel very irritated when that phrase is used, dunno why, personal trigger)].

but it's the choice that we make that defines us in that very moment. are we going to be selfish to ourselves by holding on, or to choose to change, to have faith, to gift happiness unto others. some of us choose otherwise, fearing the pain of sacrifice. we understand, we do not condemn. but we advise against it. a step backwards usually allows oneself to see the situation clearer, thereby creating an opportunity for the problem to be solved.

we all have the freedom to choose. for freedom is a right. Freedom is the right of all sentient beings.

4 more days to Revenge.

fears uncertainty and major changes. i guess i know why I'm in that profile now.

Henzy David.

So give me reason
To prove me wrong
To wash this memory clean
Let it be enough to reach the truth that lies
Across this new divide
[excerpt from New Divide, Linkin Park]

17/05/09 - Revenge is coming

2009-05-18T00:53:00.002+08:00

i've changed the poster in my room. take a look see for yourself. haha.

Revenge Is Coming.

that aside, i've actually sort of overcome my problem. and my challenge to self, let's place all that you've got to do in near-perfect balance brethren. we will be able to do it. because we can do it.

O rly?

15/05/09 - father, we need a miracle

2009-05-15T22:25:00.002+08:00

that's it. we're sick of being the bad guy.

we need to be with people, we need to be alone. we need to be understood. we need help. we need a miracle. we need your true tangible presence daily, your power and spirit to truly manifest in our lives. we've waited. we've wondered.

have we done wrong? what have we done wrong? we need faith. we need hope. we can't give up now. if we do, all will be for naught. we need to persevere. but this time, we don't want to do it by our own strength or will. we want yours. we're tired, never really seems like it, but we're tired on the inside. drained. we're lost. we need to hear the calling again.

we're still thankful, nonetheless. for the angels and Shadow that you have blessed us with. for the wise council of the brethren. for the bravery, strength, and fearlessness we christened Duskfall. to the mysterious wisdom of Mhystry. but we have need against the dark one, our own inner demon of Blackheart, embodiment of our rage and anger, jealousy and rejection, most of all disappointment. for in truth, that is what he is, dis appointment. moreover, the silent fury of the fading Frostwhisper.

we need hope. we need to push on. our battle is not over yet.

27/04/09 - I admit. it's been awhile.

2009-04-27T23:26:00.004+08:00

i admit, it's been awhile since i last blogged. excuses aside, i've been busy.

Assessments have been over since the week before and i've been out meeting up with people that i haven't exactly met for awhile, watching mythbusters, and well, trying to get used to the fact that it really is the holidays.

it seems weird for me to say that. but it's a weird feeling. one day you're out there rushing up all the work that you have to do, gaining momentum and i dunno, passionately doing your stuff. then the next, you just don't have to anymore. it just all ends there and then. well, it's a good thing. i'm not really complaining more than sharing my thoughts about the issue at hand. haha.

My iPod's here, actually, for almost about a week now and i'm really enjoying it. haha. next on the list of thing to get, well, just see for yourself eh? hahaha.

Crossroads MylarOne Bijou 2 In-ear earphones - $95 with Fiio e5 portable amp.
CrossRoads iPod Line-Out Dock - $25
Logitech Pure-Fi Express Plus Omnidirectional Speaker Dock - $139 (part of room revamp)
Topman Spider-Man T-shirt gray - $50
Zara Basic White Hoodie - $59
A Room revamp - $unknown

good thing i'm gonna start my part-time job soon. i really wonder how it's gonna feel like. for those who wanna drop by during my working hours, I'll be at serene centre, if you can even find where that it. =P

"We shall see, Duskfall."
Henzy David with Canon 450D

06/04/09 - an eventful april

2009-04-06T17:56:00.004+08:00

let's see. we're,

5 days away from my birthday, which is this saturday
and
16 days away from my assessments, which is a pain in the arse but can't be helped.

we're rushing stuff, trying our best to finish up as much homework as possible, taking time off for birthday celebrations this week and watching ToGetHer(爱就宅一起) at the same time. well. at least we're almost there. haha. let's keep us in prayer shall we. haha. motivation is something i don't really have much of for homework. lol.

A Venomous Take on tape.

04/04/09 - our self created problems

2009-04-04T12:59:00.004+08:00

finish homework.
stop self-censorship
find our voices
eradicate fear
send out "your efforts are futile" message

haven't some of us ever wondered? how, or why? why do some people generally think that they are greater than others? the words chosen, the tone of speech, even through an sms. the perceptibility of the tone is clear. yet, arrogant, self-righteous, believing that he or she can do whatever she wants in the name of what? protection? or OVER-protection?

ask not ourselves, will we not. are what we're doing really necessary when a step away the solution is? when clearly, speaking kindly, patiently, to our adversary, would give us a much more peaceful way or solution. lesser complications in the hearts of others, lesser misunderstandings. or is it really the unconscious desire of human beings to push down others, to place themselves in self proclaimed high and mighty places, overbearing on others which they deem "below" them. is it their unconscious desire to leave remnants of hurt, guilt, unforgiveness, let alone, anger in another's heart.

ask ourselves won't we. how many of our problems are actually caused by our past actions? yet we choose to just ignore it, thinking exactly the same thought that cost Spider-Man his uncle ben, "that's not my problem".

oh, "its indirect", "i never did it on purpose", "i never wanted it". really? but you did, and you have done. you just didn't think it was important, or just "not your problem". well think again. and welcome to the truth.

When Darkness Consumes

27/03/09 - breaking the silence

2009-03-27T21:09:00.004+08:00

it's been awhile hasn't it. as always, that seems to be my opening line. haha. but it's been a good while. at least now i know i'm smiling. haha. it's just great to have these people around you, needless to say, a general group from the west area closer to me. haha. i just wish we could get a group picture and place it on my bedside table or something. hah. that'd be nice.

school's been a charm. done with presentation, now all that's left to do is to get my arse to next semester, by trying my best to finish as much as possible, and topping that off with research and personal responses. shouldn't be too difficult. i'm praying that it's not. well. i guess that's just all for updates currently. haha. don't exactly have a very nice picture to post. but i'll let you have a look at this instead.

totally made with black vinyl insulating tape, i present, my spider-man poster.

PS: I think i'm hooked on V for Vendetta.

20/03/09 - he never shuts up

2009-03-20T23:21:00.001+08:00

kind of a long day today. haha. but it was fun and interesting.

there's this interesting picture that i found just now, only just. haha. and it's darn funny. so i decided to rip it off and post it here. here you go. haha.

15/03/09 - Delirious?

2009-03-15T23:02:00.001+08:00

one statement for g12 conference 09?

Delirious? rocks!

and yes, to most of them. i agree. he is very good looking. lol.

13/03/09 - prove me wrong! personality test

2009-03-13T11:27:00.003+08:00

Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education:
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You have plenty of dream jobs but have little chance of doing any of them if you don't focus on something in particular. You need to choose something and go for it to be happy and achieve success.

How do you view success:
You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

prove me wrong. i feel this is actually quite true. except for the studies portion. haha.

02/03/09 - My name is Henzy David

2009-03-02T21:56:00.002+08:00

My name is Henzy David. I am a student, a volunteer, an amateur photographer, magician in training, a brother, a close friend to few, a person with different perspectives and a believer of possibility against all odds.

In my life, I've faced many problems, been called many names, thrown down, mocked, hated, disliked, outcasted, and left alone. I have met many who deceived, many who can be trusted, and many who care.

When i was young, i faced problems of freedom and acceptance. jumping multiple communities and circles of friends, only to find that none of them really lasted. i tried to create my own circle, in vain. until i found a circle that i thought would be there forever. but no, in this world, nothing is forever. change is a constant, every human goes through change. that is why, it may be time for me to move again.

we all will wonder one day, what have we done in life that makes us so special, that makes it so worthwhile. i know what I've done. I've been a loyal friend and brother to few, or many depending on perspective. i have used my gifts and blessed many, as a shadow. i have sparked numerous conflicts in belief that it is for the greater good. and i have lived my life, though an unworthy sinner, believing in the saving grace and unconditional loving sacrifice of my Lord and Father.

I may not believe I am human, but for a classification of what i really am, there would be no other classification but human. and as all humans, we will make mistakes.

this is me showing gratitude to a few, who've made a mark in my life, a great long lasting impression.

to Huiyu: thank you for always suddenly dropping by and showing a little care and concern. i appreciate that. =) it made stuff work for me one certain day. you know which day I'm talking about.

to Min and Grace: thanks, especially the two of you. loyal sisters. haha. always lending me a listening ear or a helping hand and advice when i needed it most. you're like my younger sisters. if that even sounds right. lol.

to Bobby and Jasper: just can't seem to not have you two in my life. there's never a time where the two of you won't pop-up and drop the bomb on me. but it's always knocking sense into me, whether or not i change is another matter. but still, thank you nonetheless.

and lastly, the final group of people.

to Ethan, Yong Ming, Janice, and Cyndi: thank you people. you could say that i don't think I'll be able to live without you people. one is a hell of joker, as crude as the jokes may be. but always ready to meet up at batok for no apparent reason. the other is randomly meeting me for supper at very random times in the night, but that's a good thing, cuz that gives me supper, left4dead and a person to kill time with. one's a colour coder extraordinaire, a darn good dinner buddy and stays so close to me. and the last one's well. difficult to describe in words.

by now, you may have guessed it, this is my current circle. not to mention another shout out thanksgiving to another two people who've played a big part in my life, Waiyin mei, and shujun sis.

this is the life of Henzy David, whom regardless of how many people dislike him, know that these few, and many others do not, especially one who will never ever. He even died for him.

thank God for all of you. i wonder what i'd be without you.

26/02/09 - of hate and dislike

2009-02-26T15:39:00.002+08:00

we used to continuously harp to ourselves about being disliked, hated or unaccepted without our society. but we guess it's about time that ended. we told ourselves, -due to the reason that we know how it feels to be thrown out, to be looked at and not to be liked- that we would never hate any person again. we may dislike things about them, but we would not hate their being. we would dislike the sin, and not the sinner. for lack of better phrases of description.

do not let the sun set on your anger, or so to say, don't let your anger be carried on to the next day. do not bear grudges. to always give chances regardless. and now, to disregard those that hate or dislike you, and treat them in the same manner as you would any other person that accepts you. why do we do this? i guess it's what they call conviction? or a higher calling. or maybe because we know that it's probably the best and right thing to do.

25/02/09 - we're only ready when we start

2009-02-25T12:36:00.002+08:00

we're only ready when we start.

we're never ready before that, because we know nothing of what's going to come next. for example-although it's not a good example for non-Christians, but still-baptism. we always say we'll wait till we're ready, till we're all good, till God has done the work in us, till we're fully changed, without and bad points that we know about, till we're good. but when will we ever be good? or changed? or without bad points? when do we know when we're ready?

even when we tell ourselves we're ready? how sure are we? how do we confirm exactly that we're really ready? honestly, if that's your way of thinking, you're probably not gonna be baptised till the end of your lifetime. as an equivalent, you're probably not gonna be ready for anything until you really step forth and do it.

23/02/09 - outlet for en masse rage-energy

2009-02-23T16:06:00.002+08:00

sometimes, we just wish for an outlet for all this stored up rage-energy within us. we know its capability for destruction if used at the wrong time, but we know also of its capability of destruction if not given an outlet at all.

i don't see it as jealousy, i don't think it even is. how do we describe it then? injustice? unfair treatment? or just plain unconscious disregard? we wouldn't know, would we?

we're really wondering, what's next? what seriously is next up on the list of things to happen to Henzy David? the view seems calm, but we know it isn't. shadow conceal, deceive us, just as it had done before. we're expecting something, but we know not what to expect.

we just wish you'd open your heart to see. we're not what you think we are. we never were that easy to decipher.

21/02/09 - Henzy David is back

2009-02-21T01:52:00.001+08:00

Henzy David is back. but updates will be posted tomorrow.

and he's hooked on the Fearless album, by Taylor Swift.

04/02/09 - when the shadow of death befalls

2009-02-04T12:06:00.002+08:00

we struggle with death, all of us do. but death, may not be that simple, it may be a descriptive term, a suggestive word, or a definition of things to come. death, can be figurative, or can be thought of for what it really means.

when the shadow of death befalls, even us who struggle, who fight against it feel the pain. the near-hopelessness, the coldness of it's touch, or death's presence. but sooner or later, we find that it has become our acquaintance, instead of fear, we know how to identify it's coming. for we are also beings of shadow. for from the shadows, is the only place where no one really knows what you're doing. no one really understands, and no one really can predict.

yet, we hope, we wait, we pray, we endure. even as the pain threatens to kill us all. we work against it, towards hope. towards that singular hope that it will turn out alright. that miracles do happen.

31/01/09 - a few verses of reminder

2009-01-31T00:19:00.001+08:00

Be careful to follow every command I am giving you today, so that you may live and increase and may enter and possess the land that the LORD promised on oath to your forefathers. Remember how the LORD your God led you all the way in the desert these forty years, to humble you and to test you in order to know what was in your heart, whether or not you would keep his commands. He humbled you, causing you to hunger and then feeding you with manna, which neither you nor your fathers had known, to teach you that man does not live on bread alone but on every word that comes from the mouth of the LORD. Deuteronomy 8:1-3

But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. People who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge men into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.
1 Timothy 6:6-10

30/01/09 - mercy on our souls

2009-01-30T16:50:00.004+08:00

mercy on our soul. we can't even type properly now. damnit.

why the hell am i always not in the loop. we were fearful, were we not. we knew it was coming. but now, time's come. it's time. time to take over. to take control of everything we ever wanted.

pain, it hurts us so. death calls, nearing as time passes. we wish not to be left as a dry, soulless husk. but once again, it seems like to shall be. we have our hopes, we know what we must do. we will not fail this time, neither will we ever fail in this aspect ever again. for there will be no again.

even as the body is alive, it is dead, so long as the heart is dead.

we, will we be forsaken again? shall the pain once again encompass our soul. no. our will will not allow that to happen. not again. no, not again.

45minutes to go.

27/01/09 - we wish we could go away and restart

2009-01-27T23:37:00.002+08:00

we wish we could go away, to a place where no records exists, to a place where views could be openly expressed, and humanity was not so complex. we wish we could just find a place and restart with a clean record, a pure heart, innocence and nothing else.

in much of an emo mood these few days. honestly don't know what to do really. haha.

26/01/09 - com breakdown, 450D

2009-01-26T14:22:00.003+08:00

i've recently been cut off from the cyber realm due to certain breakdown of my very old, 6year CPU. but i'm now back online due to my brother's laptop, and a certain tweaking of stuff here and there. although i still can't really get the hang of my bro's new laptop's keyboard.

well, lots of stuff happened last week. kinda screwed up. inclusive of my own personal emotional system and the like, causing us to do very very unpredictable stuff that causes some thoughts in other's minds. but still, i'm just glad that phase is over, nd we're sorta back to normal. yea. Thank God for that.

well, right now, i guess only one image is good enough.

19/01/09 - and they say there was no discrimination

2009-01-19T12:15:00.002+08:00

they say there's no discrimination. i can give that one to them. but it's still there, nothing will change it. the invisible wall that barricades us from them, our presence, felt, but not acknowledged. they'd do anything just to prevent us from being there. i see the things that people don't see. i see how that wall will tear them apart from the inside. it's already beginning, it has already started. our time shall come, will it not?

yes, yes it will.

there was once i thought that it's priority that mattered. but all that's changed. priority gives a ranking system to things in your life. that's not something that should be done. instead, it should be the center, the center of your life, of relationships, of work, of passion. that's what He wants, to be right there with you everywhere you go, in everything you do. to be able to help you whenever you need it. that's His desire, our Father's desire.

13/01/09 - i think the management sucks, 2 days to DSLR

2009-01-13T23:02:00.003+08:00

Warning, the following post is a rant about how much school sucks at the current moment. for those who tend not to want to read it, then please proceed to just read the last paragraph which is in blue.

honestly, i think the management sucks. hell, i've got a guy who's mentality is "don't trust anyone, save my arse first, don't get into trouble, keep myself safe." hell, if that's your mentality, then you might as well don't do anything. F.E.A.R. that's the only thing i can see in you. just plain fear of the future. clearly, you're uncertainty shows your weakness. honestly, i've never seen someone so, hah, i can't even find the word for it.

side from my ranting. today was a good day because of Left4Dead. but then again, that's pretty much it. i guess. sinces from that, i'd pretty much be darn fed-up with school seemingly using us students to do a mural for their plain white walls. we have to buy our own paint, do our own work on the walls, and stick to the time limit. YOU THINK THAT EVERYONE FREE ON SATURDAY SUNDAY IS IT? bloody idiots. argh.

this is Henzy David's most negative post of the, since whenever he started blogging. lol.

God, i don't even know what to thank you for about today. maybe, the left4dead. but other than that, i dunno. but still. Love you Father. guess that's all for today. i know tomorrow will be better!

added 11.39pm.
oh yes. i know what to thank you for today God. 2 more days before the guy comes back. which also can mean, 2 more days to my DSLR! woohoo! now i'm a happy Mhystry.

10/01/09 - Henzy with God, the Shack

2009-01-10T23:17:00.003+08:00

it's been a good whole week. wholesome, as some may say. haha. done alot of things, namely going to school(s), Trybe, finished a book, dinner with DaJie Joadine at last!, left4dead with Wayne(at last for left4dead, me thinks me ish a left 4 dead junkie), and enjoyed myself in all things that i did.

as the week comes to an end, my joy still stays, well, somehow, i believe that my joy ain't just that normal joy that will disappear one day. but my joy is that exact joy(well, mayb not exact) that comes from God. it's really been a God-filled week. in all three ways. haha. and i'm loving it. my heart's light, no burden, nothing, just carefree. carefree enough even to just go to face what's coming tomorrow. haha. i guess i'm ready. not letting fear come into me, and just trusting upon the one who is.

damn. damn is a swear word. i didn't know that. lol. darn, i sure love having a relationship with God. haha.

well, heres Henzy David introducing this very very very interesting book that everyone should just pick up and read. it's titled [The Shack] by William P. Young. i think showing you the front and back covers would work better than me writing a synopsis. here's the website -> http://theshackbook.com/index.html

here they are. and that's it for tonight. remember. GO PICK UP THAT BOOK!

01/01/09 - 2009, a year of change

2009-01-01T21:44:00.002+08:00

after a power-packed countdown to the new year at Touch Centre at marine parade last night, we find the main character of our story spending the first day of the new year like how he spent his christmas day. at home, playing warcraft 3 with the brothers.

but this new year, my only resolution is to change. for the better. anger control, more discipline to really sit down and finish my work. change the outcome of my this year, so that i won't retain again. change my attitude towards people. not to be so testing. yea. a whole list. but the more important ones in front.

well. it's been a good 2008, but now, it's time to move on. We're gonna have a good 2009!

inclusive of
MORE
-DotA, Left4Dead, and team skills building games for building my help team spirit. but not forgetting my predator killing instincts either.
- fellowship time! with church family.
-devotions, reading of word daily with the help of books, namely [Destined to Reign devotional] by pastor Joseph Prince. and other christian living books.
-books to read, ideas to flow, movies to watch, mangas to look at, chocolate and desserts to indulge in, and good food to feed the stomach
-not to miss my EOS 450D DSLR coming soon, very very soon. which also means, more outing for photo taking.
-and of course, more time to spend with.

we are so gonna have a good year. cheers

26/12/08 - trybe xmas celebration, where's the spirit this year?

2008-12-26T23:31:00.006+08:00

today's the trybe Christmas celebration. which was fun and all, had supper at chinese garden, took a walk down to chinese garden at night and stuff. but i suddenly don't feel like blogging and stuff. i mean. I've just sat here for one whole day updating my blog. damn, life sucks when you don't have the right group of people to hang out with.

so hard to find the right group to fit in, so hard to create a group to stay in. it's just pissing and irritating. where do the balancers go? the people who are not that 'busted', not vulgar, not sexually referenced, who are sensitive to others feelings, who choose to have a balance of powers in life? where is their place?

what is acceptance then? what do we accept about someone? what is there to accept about someone? what are etiquettes when no one really cares? why do we follow? we follow, because we know that if we don't, chaos ensues itself in the world, there is no peace, no respect for others or self.

Where's the Christmas Spirit this year?

Henzy David hates it when cells say its a cell event. or is that really what he hates about it. so much for community. ah,we know what it is now. he hates restrictions. on himself and on others.

25/12/08 - christmas day, christmas day, one whole dota day

2008-12-25T15:20:00.002+08:00

so, how did you spend your christmas this year Henzy David?

hmm, in one word, alone.
or if elaborated, alone at home playing DotA for the whole day.

24/12/08 - marvel ultimate alliance

2008-12-24T15:16:00.002+08:00

in short, it was a day of Marvel Ultimate Alliance. it sure has been awhile since i last touched a playstation controller. or hear the sound of it clank onto the ground. sure brings back memories.

one afternoon over at wayne's place with jasper and zheng quan, if that's how his name is spelt playing MUA is two things. one, enjoyable. two, straining on the eyes. but it was nonetheless fun. haha. supposed to go out with some trybe people after that, but somehow, it seems that the outing was cancelled. haha.

23/12/08 - a year and two months

2008-12-23T23:09:00.002+08:00

enjoyable. that's basically sums up the day i had. to a Pinch of Salt for lunch with Cyndi, Waiyin, Vivien and Jonathan. which brings me to a point that i thought about. that its bloody hilarious to sit there and watch humans get overreact when some big star or artiste is within their presence. i mean, why? it's just another human being, it's not like as though that person's a god, has amazing powers or elemental control or whatnot. oh well, to each his own huh.

after that we headed down to Vivo City, met up with Nelson(by chance(at least to us)), and caught Yes Man. which was great. damn funny. minus the sexual references, it's worth the watch.

guess that's all for today. side from replacing my computer's monitor which broke down like, yesterday. haha.

18/12/08 - one man can change the world

2008-12-18T23:28:00.003+08:00

"I believe in an idea. An idea that a single invdividual who has the right heart and the right mind. that is consumed with a single purpose, that one man can win a war. give that one man a group of soldiers with the same conviction, and you can Change the World." -Captain America

that's an excerpt from Dark Reign; New Nation. and a very meaningful excerpt indeed. it says of an idea for world transformation. but at the same time, with the intend of putting through that a man by himself can win a war with the right heart and mind. but a group, a team, an organisation, with that same heart and mind can create a greater impact, can change the world.

i honestly love these kinds of stuff. words filled with power and convictions. passion and great aspirations. and most of all, it serves as a form of encouragement to me. a passion igniting encouragement for my life.

there's this other thing to post tonight, which is the love languages. 5 of em'. and here's mine.

My Detailed Results:
Quality Time:	10
Physical Touch:	9
Words of Affirmation:	5
Acts of Service:	4
Receiving Gifts:	2

About this quiz

Unhappiness in relationships is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. It can be helpful to know what language you speak and what language those around you speak.

Take the Quiz!

yea. that's it for the night.

12/12/08 - Twilight

2008-12-12T01:18:00.000+08:00

today can be summed up into two things.

1) I explored the revamped Jurong Point today. alone.
2) I watched Twilight today. not alone.

11/12/08 - another flyer day

2008-12-11T21:51:00.002+08:00

nice. the second time i went to the singapore flyer. and you know what. it's the day after the first day i went there. only with a different group of people, this time, with Jessica, Wayne, Bobby and Junjie. for dinner, and you know what? Popeye's again! haha. not bad. lol.

10/12/08 - to the singapore flyer

2008-12-10T21:35:00.003+08:00

it was Bolt again for today's schedule. i caught bolt for the 2nd time with Cyndi, Waiyin, Vivien and Nelson. yea. it's a weird matchup. but that's just how it looks like. nearly fell asleep for the first part of the show. lol. but looking at the animations again was like a fresh sight in a sense that you understand how much effort they put in and stuff like that.

took a walk down to the Singapore Flyer after walking around Millenia Walk and Suntec City. sat by the sea, slacked and relaxed and stuff. took a few pictures of the flyer and waited for nightfall, where the flyer would light up and have much more interesting shots. haha. had popeye's for dinner, headed to esplanade for brownies and to marina square for starbucks. totally enjoyed ourselves today. lol.

06/12/08 - a monster out of madness

2008-12-06T23:38:00.005+08:00

I'm on a character development spree!

and i caught bolt today. haha. well, it is a very nice show. predictable at some parts, but totally amazing. the amount of work the animators put into it is also commendable, judging from the realism of certain things from the movie. yes, that's me complimenting them for their hard work, giving them the due credit for it. and i honestly think people should really give them more credit for it. after all, they put in so much effort, and we cannot just leave a blind eye to that, that would just be doing them a disservice.

the My Hope videos were very very heart warming and well, impacting. i just wish that i had the proper people to bring. giving this gift this christmas would probably be the best gift of all. the gift of life.

Warning: The following post contains disturbing images, viewer discretion is advised

You've made a monster out of Madness

and indeed i have. you've got to wonder, why haven't i been updating my blog regularly this season. in all true pure honesty, i've been thinking. yes, once again, in one of those thinking moods. and thus far, what i've though about, my character, my choice of words, my attitude, my behavior. all these things have made me what i am today. all these things also have their consequences, collateral damage they say.

the pure embodiment of Mhystry's anger and rage, Black-Heart. this black entity can change any portion of it's body's form to suit any requirement at the current point in time. a near-unstoppable force, it will stop at nothing to see all things reduced to nothing but dust. primitive, yet it can gain intelligence over time, adapting to situations when required. it is anger at it's most fearsome and terrible form. this is Mhystry's greatest enemy yet. the darkness of himself.

Personal Thoughts: looking at it creates a certain fear in my heart. knowing that what i'm looking at actually reminds me of how terrible and destructive my anger actually can be. the things it does to the people around me and myself. Black-Heart serves as a fearsome reminder of why i should not let my own anger out of control. the darkness it can create. the monster that my anger really is.

and some of you wonder why i made something so ugly.

01/12/08 - the watcher's peak

2008-12-01T22:08:00.003+08:00

post number 700.

things to do during the holidays
1) shake off the remaining stress - in other words, finishing up all remaining work
2) deal with personal character and relationship problems
3) relax, relax, relax and relax
4) catch up with people whom I've not talked to for quite awhile
5) go to the flyer, marina barrage and any scenic locations

sigh, my 'watcher's peak' shots turned out to be abit off colored. too much red on one side. but i'm gonna upload one or two anyways. haha.

today was kinda nice, the 2nd last day of kee tat's freedom before NS. but yea. here's the pictures.

Duskfall

Apocalyptic

30/11/08 - the complications of life

2008-11-30T23:28:00.002+08:00

i find it abit complicating. this thing called life. never really was a fan of it, although i loved mine pretty much. the way things were handed out to me. but still, it is really complicating. to have to do so many things to balance out life.

abit of anger burning, abit of control lost, and it seems that my posture has been jeopardised. how long has it been since i lost it in an outside area. but at that point, did it seem to care? no. it seems that i've become one that doesn't really bother about what others think sometimes. it's a pro and con. but still. it's over. and let's put the past behind us.

Legends are written, sometimes, by themselves.

27/11/08 - the pillars of the sun

2008-11-27T16:43:00.005+08:00

Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls. 1 Peter 1:8-9

as it is, this verse was sent to me as the daily verse for the day. and yes, also as it is. it's been said i think more than once after i read the verse. once i think was at today's open cell. so. how coincidental is it. not at all. planned as they say.

well. today was another one of those totally unmotivated days. find myself lazying around. i don't think my work will be sufficient for tml. but i've been sent a first warning letter. apparently, attendance for october wasn't enough. 71%. lol. ok. interesting.

sigh. let 12pm tomorrow come quick. let it come quick. and let all this be over with, for now. i need a break. and a real good one. with sun, wind and sky, maybe not too much sun. hahaha.

Pillars of the Sun
Henzy David

26/11/08 - the twilight deal

2008-11-26T21:26:00.006+08:00

i wish i had more time. then again, who doesn't wish they had more time. i think i'm demoralised by the aftermath of the 2d. i'm now in a state of nua-ness. lol. totally slacked off total playing patapon and meeting people up. lol. well. the good news is. hmm. i'm still alive. i guess that counts as good news. haha.

hmm. picked up a copy of photoshop cs3 for digital photographers at the library today. the condition was horrible. lol. coffee stains on top, cover's ripped in places, white and black spots at most places. damn, i really hate people who don't take care of stuff. lol.

guess that's all for the night. haha.

Ripples of the Sky
Henzy David

25/11/08 - Mhystry, Shadow and the Cloak of Night

2008-11-25T23:17:00.005+08:00

now I've got a dilemma. and as if being stressed over school wasn't bad enough.

on the 13th of December, i have two major projects.
1) a performance at an open house (5-9 apparently)
2) another event at a Church 'My Hope' Christmas party (6-9 i think)
as you already would have thought, my problem is which one to go? zzz.

right, aside from that. i'm pretty tired. you would be if you'd have stayed up till 3 last night and went travelling around singapore today.

i think i'm just maybe like, disappointed due to the grade that i got for 2D.

at least i did my final self poster better than last year. that's for certain. haha. guess i'll post it up anyways. haha. both this year's and last years.

Last Year's.

Mhystry, Shadow and the Cloak of Night
Mixed Media, Water Color, Poster Paint, Acrylic and Poker Cards
Henzy David
This Year's

22/11/08 - the soundtrack of my summer

2008-11-22T22:17:00.003+08:00

the humourous Madagascar; Escape 2 Africa was on my list today. apparently it was quite funny. although i've got no preferences for CGI Animated animals. haha. but still, it was humourous to the extent of having the whole cinema laugh together with you. haha.

"your voice was the soundtrack of my summer
do you know you're unlike any other"

i need a control of my temper. and apparently, bottling stuff up isn't helping. i wish you were here. i'm wishing for a way out. sometimes, i wish you'd be able to the know the very thoughts of my heart, the exact details of them. then it wouldn't be so difficult for you.

"i wanna let you know how much i feel your pain."

after awhile, everyone gets tired, exhausted. we learn to change, we adapt to situations, we succumb to pressure, we fall, we collapse, we grow weary. but we understand that, and we do things so that we won't feel that way. we make an effort, and that's what counts. that evidence of an effort that we make to show others that we change. that we acknowledge their efforts and concern.

21/11/08 - filling in the gaps

2008-11-21T15:21:00.002+08:00

yes. i've been inactive for a certain period of time. i don't deny the fact, neither will i give reasons for doing so. or maybe i will. hahahaha.

it's been awhile, the past week has been a busy week, and the coming one isn't about to be any different. but i take comfort in knowing that after next friday, all will be over. (for now)

let's seek. a list of what we've been doing would be this.
seeking God
attending wedding.
doing homework, rushing, in a sense
being happy about my review grade for Drawing F.
contemplating Canon 450D for $1 at courts. but with a catch that i'll be in debt for 48 months.
solving certain matters of the heart.
acquiring and playing Need for Speed Undercover on PSP.
meeting up people
and attending open cell.

that's it for now. for more reference, just refer to the previous posts. which i'm working on right now.

20/11/08 - open cell thursday, WCP

2008-11-20T23:25:00.004+08:00

it all started off with Ethan having a need to learn cycling. and thus we ended up in West Coast park, to be disappointed by the fact that all the bike rental there was gone! lol. for God knows how long. so we ended up walking along west coast road, heading to the bus stop and travelling to IMM for lunch, then to Jurong Point, and then again to Serene centre. all in search for centerpieces for Ethan's room/table/whatever-you-want-to-call-it and also for me to get ASM578 and then to clementi again.

i wonder why i didn't see Joadine and Junjie at Island Creamery know, honestly. i can't believe myself. i guess i was too obsessed with getting over to clementi in the quickest time possible because i was late. lol.

skipping Sunset way-Daily scoop's sinful ice-cream with brownie, the now group of Jess, Joa, Junjie, Bobby and I headed down to this hawker centre for some cheap yet good western food. then to this open area near clementi mrt station for open cell.

Twilight's Serenity
Henzy David

A Frosty Hope
Henzy David

talk about being very attributed to elements. seeking for that tangible feeling of God's touch. i found myself brought back to the time back in a trybe camp at monfort sec. cut that down to size, my tangible feeling is the blowing of the wind.

19/11/08 - seeking God, review day two

2008-11-19T23:58:00.003+08:00

today was quite eventful. or in other words, mind opening.

i never knew that people thought that i actually had a stuck up mindset. well that's a new one. i guess in my attempts to retain my character, it seems that i developed a symptom of closing up whatever good points that i found i had, and making sure that they stayed there. i guess that symptom just overflowed and it became a bad thing in total. total prevention of change. well. that should've sucked i guess. but i didn't know it. i couldn't feel it. i didn't understand.

well, thank God for those people whom i have respect enough to listen to. honestly, I've got around 6 of you guys. and well, i guess you people know who you are. haha. thanks for the patience. and also, a special thanks to a certain Jasper Chia, for speaking up for me behind my back, believing that i'm not as problematic or as bad as what they say if you don't compare me to the system. =)

-------

today was also my review day for drawing fundamentals. and well, i'm just happy that i got a grade higher than last year. haha. this year's DF grade = C!!!! haha. satisfied with the small things. here's one piece of work that i took 4hours to do. the last two hours were last minute. haha. chromatic grays.

11/11/08 - let's see the future

2008-11-11T22:07:00.003+08:00

the gift of precognition

an ability that i possess on occasion. it's an amazing gift that i really thank God for. somehow, there just seems to be this feeling, this power that just seems to. umm, what? huh? lol. i can't explain it. even if i do, people are gonna think that i'm crazy, cept for say, Cyndi and Ethan, the real true people who have seen it come to pass before. and i really also thank them for believing in my talent. thanks to God for giving it to me too. cheers Father!

An-nee-ways, i've received comments for being happier than usual. in a sense that i'm always smiling nowadays. is it true? i mean, for those who've seen me in the past and now, what's the difference, the tagboard's there for replies. i'm open to responses. maybe it's the joy of the Lord. hahaha. which incidentally also means that another one of my prayers have come true.

5 is really a number that i hold on to alot. why? it's the number of Grace. i mean, looking back upon my life, i've realised that i've really been blessed, so much. grace overflowing indeed.

"let your life show God in you."

08/11/08 - what have you been doing henzy david?

2008-11-08T23:02:00.003+08:00

so, what have you been doing Henzy David?

well, it apparently seems that i've bee chionging on my homework. currently, i've near to almost completed all the 2D stuff except for research, elements and principles of design, color charts and self project. that's about, say, roughly 35% more to go i guess? haha

side from that i've been Defending the ancients, getting a sense of accomplishment out of completing my homework, and making Sihan jealous cuz i got the whole twilight series. haha.

that's the end of my short update. haha.

04/11/08 - stress of equality

2008-11-04T23:38:00.002+08:00

Pathetic

that's what the world is right now. pathetic. i finally understand what it means to be childlike. and at the same time, have a taste of abit of what the world is like. money-minded, searching only for the best, unfair, unequal and prejudiced. my stress today wasn't stress due to incomplete work. it was stress due to the understanding of unfairness of the system.

after calming myself down, i prayed for serenity to accept that which i cannot change, yet, i still find myself disgusted with the system, with the world. what are we going to do? what will we do? sit there and think that we're not adequate to make a change? or shall we stand and seize every opportunity to impact and change society? i choose the latter.

01/11/08 - why do i entertain chain emails?

2008-11-01T23:22:00.004+08:00

why do i even entertain all these chain emails/letters? i mean, they're totally for secondary school student who like to scare the shit out of themselves like for God knows what reason. which reminds me, there's this thought too. why do people pay to watch horror movies to scared themselves? i mean, it's totally meaningless. to pay to have something done to you which you don't want and to suffer the after effects of it; imagining stuff, afraid of the dark, etc, etc, etc. sigh.

another wonder is why people freaking believe in the shit that's being said in the emails and or letters. oh well.

this was just a random post of thought provoking substance. haha. at least Henzy David is now back to normal. but wait, he hasn't touched his workload, it's the same as before this week. OH NOES!!!!! right. at least we know what to do about that. haha. jiayou! i'll be able to do it. =) believe in myself.

Foundation For Us All
Henzy David
Canon IXUS 850IS

29/10/08 - 3 more days

2008-10-29T13:01:00.002+08:00

there are times where i want to eat, but just can't eat. and there are times where i want to stop eating, but just can't stop.

i keep pacing around, trying to distract my mind from stuff. trying to reconfigure my system to sit down and do something. trying to stop myself from thinking too much. i know, i seem to know that i must get out of the house. soon. soon, i tell myself. maybe after i finish acquiring DJ Max Clazziquai Ed.

we're missing you already.
50% of Eclipse to go.

28/10/08 - the carelessness of me, trybe YISS

2008-10-28T23:48:00.002+08:00

sigh, the carelessness of me. i should have checked when i realised that there was no tapping sound when i tapped my card. but i thought it was a minor fluke. who knows that i'd actually left my ezlink card at the lan shop. thank God for Wayne who went down to pick it up for me. while i was busy with other stuff. mainly.....

Trybe. at YISS. for a student leader programme. that was fun. i mean, i didn't expect to see that many of the people that i'd taken in the previous YI run there. it was actually quite shocking. a certain ridzuan, joey and a few others whom i can't remember their names clearly. running the station of "tallest challenge" with roxy was actually very very HOT! due to the weather. surprised also by team 3; Tuesday, my team. lol. their record at my station was thus far the best one, 1.85m. of what? of stacked feet soles. Tuesday eventually went on to come up top. haha. good job Tuesday!

thankfully also to porkshan's eyedrops that my eye is now okay. haha. irritated by the air conditioning drying up the moisture in my right eye. lol. that's all for today.

27/10/08 - frozen time

2008-10-27T12:46:00.002+08:00

its a public holiday, and it feels like the world just came to a standstill. time feel frozen. it doesn't feel like it's afternoon, just feels like it's stuck here. maybe i'm just dazed. maybe that's the cause.

"it's one in a million, the chances of feeling the way we do."

25/10/08 - can i have this dance

2008-10-25T23:44:00.004+08:00

and with every step together, we just keep on getting better.

saturday was cool. funny, i watched two movies today. but i'm not up for reviews tonight. just commentaries.

the first, watched in the morning, was High School Musical 3. not bad. i mean, seeing it on the big screen for the first time just totally changed the atmosphere about it, maybe because other times i'd watched it on the computer, so the quality might not have been that good due to the reason that it may have been ripped from the TV or something, but the theatre screen changed it all. i wouldn't say that it's worth the watch on big screen though, some parts a little draggy, some parts very corny/lame, but some parts were just, hmm, looking for the word, umm, sweet, i guess.

the second movie, was Tropic Thunder. M18, reason being that the vulgarities used within the movie were used like there was no tomorrow. that aside though, it was crazily hilarious. i mean, star-studded cast, real-life trailer replicas, the beijing crying monkey award, and flying, spinning kid. very funny. this one is a must watch for those who just wanna laugh at some brainless, mindless, killing action. hahaha.

other than that, i finally managed to get my copy of Eclipse of the Twilight Saga. which completes the collection.

so gonna watch the Twilight movie. here's the trailer.

on another note. the final note for tonight i guess. is just one song that i really think is nice. DONT JUDGE ME!!! hahaha. but it's not from tropic thunder. lol. those who watched it would know what i mean.

right, here's the song.

21/10/08 - near-complete system failure

2008-10-21T22:09:00.002+08:00

while i'm gaining momentum, i'm slowly losing my concentration or control over my mind. it's frustrating to know. for once you're gaining speed and enjoyment over something that you have to and like to do. but it inadvertedly is causing you to slowly lose control over you mind, creating a maelstrom of total chaos within. my thoughts are practically flying everywhere, the voices in my head a pure chaos. (did i ever tell you that i talk to myself in my head? lol!)

it's a near-complete system failure. and the sadder thing is that my earphones just broke down on me. can't hear one side. sigh.

need prayer! and need to control myself.

20/10/08 - we've been in a dilemma

2008-10-20T23:50:00.002+08:00

Dilemma. that's the best word to describe the situation that we're in right now. it seems that the choices of life are abit problematic for henzy david at the current situation. the 'work' option has currently been aborted due to family reasons, namely because 'dad' doesn't encourage it, prefering to encourage 'concentration' on studies. acceptable thus far. at least that's one problem solved.

'workload' on the other hand, refering to the amount of work from school is a different story nonetheless. it is enjoyable, and the momentum is slowly building, but i wonder how long it will last. i'll just have to make myself persevere for another 5 weeks, and it'll all be over. for now. at least that is under my means of control.

it seems also that my temperament fluctuates while i'm in a state that people would call 'blur' or 'dazed'. true.

honestly, i'm just doing updates. i've like got no idea why i'm typing all this out. maybe just to clear my mind abit for now. it really needs that i guess. so many things in my mind right now. and only one that's really that damn important. but only God can solve that problem. honestly, how is my relationship with people around me or even with God the father. i'm perplexed, confused. i'm praying, hoping that this would be solved soon. i don't want this to drag on further, especially when it comes to relationships, God knows how much i treasure them. calm down, don't lose your mind.

well, today's trybe run at Boon Lay sec was fun. namely because the class was pretty interactive and fun to be with. lighthearted, sec 2 - 7. enjoyed myself there.

13/10/08 - redundant vs not so redundant; twilight; Spider-Man Posters

2008-10-13T21:48:00.004+08:00

recently, i've been up to alot of weird and random stuff. notably, buffing my room with new stuff. devouring books once more, hanging out with friends, and well, just basically relaxing myself for the time being. this is all preparation for what i'm going to do next. which is to sit myself down and finish up most, hopefully all of my work for school within the next 6weeks. and then enjoy even more for the 6weeks after that, which is holiday! hopefully can get some extra cash again. haha, then it'll be christmas.

a restraining order placed on myself recently, or just me, restraining myself from buying totally redundant stuff. which follows - Sode no Shirayuki; translated Sleeve of White Snow. which is Kuchiki Rukia's Zanpaktou/Katana/whatever-you-want-to-call-it. which is extremely beautiful, so much so that no picture of it will do it justice, and also incredibly light.

a V for Vendetta poster. which costs $80. which is also not allowed to be in SG, which is also a collector's item, and is also, incredibly, incredibly rare. but still. i don't need it. just wanted it for it's tagline.

but the things that i did get however. were reasonably cool and..... and......... and................
not so redundant. check it out.

1) Spider-Man 3 Movie Posters
now fashionably spicing up my room wall. these two spider-man 3 posters were happily acquired using Ethan's 20% staff discount, A2 sized, available at Popcorn Pop, while stocks last.

2) Twilight and New Moon
written by Author Stephenie Meyers. thilling, adrenaline pumping, romantic. and sometimes, just a wee bit able to make you lost. it's worth the read. i finished twilight 4days after i got it, and just got New Moon today. haha. Eclipse and Breaking Dawn are next!

3) Design Store Graniph Shirt
for $30, if two are purchased. otherwise, its $35. description not required. picture is self-explanatory.

07/10/08 - oktober

2008-10-07T22:39:00.002+08:00

Henzy David has been inactive for four days. due to a few certain reasons. namely.
he was sick, on the 6th and 7th of October.

other reasons are either too superficial, or well. i just forgotten. haha. right. currently, it seems that this october's gonna be nightmarish. gotta finish up lots of work. oh well. guess it is inevitable. damn, i need a long long long long slack break. lol. totally at a loss of what to blog about. so i guess i'll end here.

03/10/08 - wake the silent

2008-10-03T22:03:00.003+08:00

it is true that the presence of God can be felt when the brethren gather. building up each other when fellowshipping about all things related to the art of having a relationship with the Father in Heaven.

"i see it as a sign, it's time to take over..."

i sincerely love my friday lessons. dispite having to travel to locations far off sometimes, i find it very fun and interesting. another very fun thing is multiplayer mode, conquer the galaxy mode, of star wars the force unleashed on PSP. lol. which i spent wednesday night and today afternoon playing with wayne and bobby. lol. guess that's all for now.

We're still waiting
Henzy David
Canon IXUS 850IS

30/09/08 - when death is summoned

2008-09-30T16:27:00.003+08:00

when a person takes his (or her) life, we have a few questions to ponder. why did he summon death in the first place. that's the way i like to put it. or in normal speech terms, why did he seek death? for what reasons.

the following questions are also asked, what happens to his family. how will his friends react. it's interesting, in a sense. death was so near to me these few days. friend's family member passed away, a couple committed suicide by jumping off the block opposite mine. but we have also, the most interesting yet unanswerable question yet. where will they go after death? do they see each other? we believe in one thing. but it's another to prove that one thing. we have faith, but is it blind? how strong is our heart to be able to conquer death?

my prayer is that those affected would be given peace of mind, calmness of heart. and joy, to know that those they've lost, have ascended to somewhere greater than where we are now. after all, just like that army slogan "it's not what you've left behind. but what you gain ahead."

to those who've faced Death before.

28/09/08 - to stand or to remain silent

2008-09-28T22:43:00.002+08:00

"i want it to be like a myth, a legend, some folklore. that people would talk about it. but be unsure of whether it exists..."

sounds like something controversial. guess I'm not the only one that can become upset with the way the church works. with that, I'm encouraged, and put to ease. guess we're all humans, and when those of us who dare to stand become agitated, we strike. i guess that's just natural ain't it.

concerning that though, I'm contemplating. should i continue on to be what i was like in the past, one that would just stand for his beliefs and voice out his opinions, or just take another path. due to the numerous accounts of well, my stories being told, it seems that that would be a better way. to just keep silent and not bother about whatever people say. I'm honestly unsure. it's just so, irritating that people have a certain mindset about you when you choose to stand for your beliefs and voice out what you feel. like you're being outcast by the society that you in the past, strive so hard to be accepted in.

i guess for us, it has to be that other way then. to create our own society instead of conform to the norm. due to the difference in perspectives, we'll never be accepted. our ideas will always be scrutinized. we will always be shot down. but i guess that's the way the world works. when the majority is your opposition. we can be a Soul Guardian, or we can be a Silent Guardian. it is our choice. to stand, or not to stand. i won't make my choice yet. staying in limbo is still the current best solution.

27/09/08 - end the day

2008-09-27T22:19:00.003+08:00

"i need not justify my actions to thee"

there's nothing much i can do about it if it has to be this way, i mean, blaming me for another's actions? i don't care, i don't even bother. if he wants to do that then let him be. it's his choice not mine, and i don't have anything to do with it.

we seem to have deceived ourself long enough.

in truth, it is probably better that i don't work for a few days in a row. cuz the amount of stress accumulated would probably kill me. i mean, i seem to have a habit of being unable to work for long hours without resting, in a sense of relaxing, playing games, stuff like that. sometimes, we just like put too much stress on ourselves. haha.

well. after all that's past throughout the day, we all try to end the day right.

End The Day
Henzy David
Canon IXUS 850IS

25/09/08 - frozen tear; chocolate bras?

2008-09-25T21:51:00.003+08:00

one dream, to have a gamer's computer system. with all the cool gamer stuff, like the n52e, the razer lachesis, razer goliathus, megalodon sound system, barracuda sound card, and the predator com. lol. what a dream eh. it is possible, but the amount spent on these things could taken to do something else. well, that's just me dreaming.

now an added advantage to the psp, the psp bible. lol.

and this picture should give you guys a little to laugh about.

chocolate bras? fail!

24/09/08 - for a brand new day

2008-09-24T22:22:00.002+08:00

we want to start afresh. there's more to life that this. we've decided, it's time to turn back from our ways, time to not worry and contemplate so much. let's have it for a brand new day. to just believe and have faith.

22/09/08 - one man's silence is another's bliss

2008-09-22T23:48:00.004+08:00

Silence.
this term is used to represent a phenomenon whereby no sound is produced in a particular area or by a particular person. it is also used to describe the action of relinquishing a person of his or her lifeforce, thereby killing said person. that however, is not my emphasis on this post.

One Man's Silence is Another's Bliss.
this is true. regardless of situations. whether it be a person that you dislike being silent, or you yourself not speaking for any particular reasons.

we've come to appreciate it for it's greatness and value. and thus, embracing it.

well, this is just darn cool. and funny. take a look at this.

21/09/08 - why's it so empty?

2008-09-21T23:02:00.004+08:00

it was a particularly weird feeling that we got while we were at Orchard area during the night. the streets, shopping malls and passageways were all nearly empty. it was like Singapore's population just got greatly reduced to around a thousand people. speculating the reason as to why the streets were near deserted, we came upon a few. one of which was, the rapture must have happened. or the other one, which was more logical, that the F1 night race was going on. but honestly, it was really darn empty. just take a look at the pictures.

well, there's this other thing that's pretty important. this paragraph is a special tribute to Keith Chan. lol. remember this?

i'm sure the rest of the BoC should remember too. other than that. that's just about it.

20/09/08 - a different kind

2008-09-20T23:45:00.006+08:00

it has been awhile since i've been here, and yes, there are alot of new stuff to blog about now, from being absent from this space for 4 days. school's been eating my time, especially thursday class which spans from 2-6pm. smack right in the middle of the afternoon. instantly kills that day that one.

love is friday class though, the lecturer's great, the places that we go to are great, notably esplanade last week and T3 changi airport this week. next week would be suntec city. side from that, we've found a travelling buddy at school. haha. one Daryl Leonidas Tan for the win! lol. God bless him to be able to get to the next level and not retain like me. haha. well, i guess God really has his own plans that we won't know.

New Game that's being played: Star Wars; The Force Unleashed.
this one's cool. very very cool. there's really nothing much that i can say about it right now cuz i'm trying to hold in my thoughts for the next paragraph. but all i can say, is that this is one heck of a good game. for storyline, effects. especially when i'm playing it on a handheld console.

there was this interesting conversation that i wanna take special note of which happened on friday. we were at Popeye's at T1 after drawing class. I was with Gerry, Isabelle and Daryl. what were we talking about exactly? interesting topic, believing in Christ and the stuff that follows it. like why we do certain stuff as christians/catholic, why we believe in certain stuff.

i come to quote something that bobby said a week ago, that i really do believe in. I'm the kind of guy that new christians would be better off not being near me. but for the older ones, i'm the guy that challenges their beliefs. for what cause? i believe thats very simple. to make their belief stronger. apparently, i've come by to interpret that people of the faith don't want their people to challenge their beliefs due to the fear of them falling away. difference again, i'm not, i believe that i'm God's people.

honestly speaking, if you fall away, that just means that you've convinced yourself otherwise of what you initially believed in. i have a strong emphasis on a human's willpower in his or her own life. i believe that ultimately, every single one of us is in control of our own circumstances, situations, etc etc etc. i believe that for myself, i won't allow myself to fall away from God even if i challenge my beliefs due to the reason that i understand that He has sacrificed so much for me because He loves me and still does and will always do.

many would disagree with me. but like i always say, what to do? that's just me. and it's something that i love about myself. well, i'm used to it. so it doesn't matter to me. just think about it. challenging your beliefs for the sake of making yourself stronger.

Light of Above

Henzy David

Overcomer

Henzy David

Message of Love

Henzy David

You Gave It All

Henzy David

all images taken with Canon Digital IXUS 850IS camera.

16/09/08 - of lost-ness and confusion

2008-09-16T21:36:00.002+08:00

it was quite a weird day for me. i mean, like really weird. you wake up on time, feeling totally awake, but just go back to sleep for a few more 5mins. get on the bus and feel like the whole world's spinning. and that's not all. it was almost the same after class ended. like blindly following your classmates to bugis for a moment, aimlessly walking over to the bus stop, then running across the road to catch the bus that you can take home.

maybe it's my lack of sleep. maybe i was hungry. too much water maybe? inhaled too much paint fumes? or maybe it really was just caused my the writing on my hand. i don't know. honestly, it was just darn weird. oh well. what to do. haha. it just happens doesn't it. like you totally just lose control over yourself for the time being.

15/09/08 - ethereal

2008-09-15T23:31:00.005+08:00

Ethereal
Silence
Shadow of the Wind
Duskfall
Moonhare

Mhystry
Henzy David

The Art of Deception, the Most Beautiful of Art Forms.

14/09/08 - the nexus of dominion [edited]

2008-09-14T23:35:00.003+08:00

[post edited, retyped on 16/09/08 - the nexus of dominion]

well, today is a day that i have more time. instead of the sunday which this post is dated. after heading off to funan from service with Jasper, getting the new keyboard that i will elaborate more on later. we met up with the other group of people which we were supposed to be with initially. namely, Daryl, Frans, and Jonathan, Wayne and his friend whom which i forgot the name. joining us later would be Joadine Dajie, Cherie and Jaren. not too sure if i left anyone out.

chill out session at the Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf at Wheelock Place. it was a great time of fellowship, talking on about army stuff, laughing about it. joking about where Jasper and Frans would be posted to and stuff like that. lol. it was a bus ride home with Daryl and Jonathan, and that ends my day.

Product Review - The Razer Lycosa Gaming Keyboard
yes, if you're wondering, this is my new keyboard. so you're asking, why'd you go get such an expensive one. maybe you're just wondering how much of a waste of money it is. well, in a different perspective, this thing is a beauty.

the keyboard design is sleek, slim...

with rubber finish on the buttons, fully programmable macro keys(which means you can program a few different keys into a single key)...

touchscreen to switch gaming profiles, control music players, volume activate WASD cluster lighting...

and it's fully backlighted. it also has a 1ms response time. which means, the difference between the time that you press the key and the letter shows up on the screen is only 1millisecond.

i am satisified, serious. i'm loving this keyboard. haha. you can say it was one of the best buys since my diamondback. i mean, even if you don't use it to play games, you can simply admire it's beauty, and love the feel of the keys on your finger tips.

-----
well, aside from the keyboard. it seems that after church activities are getting more and more, unexciting. there's like nothing much to do, or just that we're not doing as much as we did before everyone went to national service. seems like when Jasper and Frans disappeared, the after-church-life became very mundane. lol. let's do something about it. i don't know what, but all i know is that we need to do something about it. yup.

it also seems that my command of the chinese language has improved. according to Huiyin, which me and jasper met on the bus to wheelock. because i was conversing with her in chinese all the way. well, that's a good sign isn't it. haha. not bad, not bad at all. and i know who i have to thank. haha.

Wishlist
Acer Aspire Predator - $5999
~~Razer Lycosa Gaming Keyboard $119~~

12/09/08 - to stand for what you believe in

2008-09-12T20:37:00.005+08:00

i like going to the esplanade rooftop. the calm relaxing ambience, the cool breeze or occasional strong gust of wind that blows by, the skyline view, the waterfront. it's just a place that I like cuz it gives me that calm soothing feeling.

The Sentinels
Henzy David

Overgrowth
Henzy David

Hope or Despair
Henzy David

yeap, i was there for drawing this morning. there's nothing special about that. lol. it was a walk around the place day. esplanade, suntec, raffles city, funan, raffles city, city link, raffles city, raffles place, central, and then home. the amount of times raffles city appears on the list.

Heaven's Glow
Henzy David

standing for what you believe in comes with a price. sometimes, the price may very well be costly. it's happening everywhere. no matter where you go, this war is being fought. the opposition may be anyone. regardless of stature, rank or emotional status. this war is ruthless, it always seems negative to the one standing up for what he or she believes in. it requires courage, wit, and ultimately, determination. even the slightest falter of determination, a moving of one's heart, could cause the downfall of that belief. is this what i stand for? honestly, i cannot respond with an ultimate answer. strike only when provoked.

The Silent Guardian
Henzy David
Canon IXUS 850IS

*All pictures are taken with canon IXUS 850IS Digital Camera and are copyrights of Henzy David.