Monday, April 16, 2007
first day at school. truthfully i don't like what i'm doing right now. i wanna change school. really. i've got lots of things to think about right now. thing that can't be rushed. things that are just too heavy for me. it feels like my world's crashing down so fast that i can't place everything back into place in time. immense pressure. argh.
sometimes, i just wanna shout BAKA!!(pardon me keith).. and take out every single thing from me. just throw it all away and start anew. with the good things in hand. i know myself, i know i can't push it further. but i'm doing it. i'm pushing myself to the limit. there will be no words of defeat. i will not fall. my faith will not falter. but in the end, i'm still human.
just emptying out things into this place, where everyone can see it. which is what i want them to. cause what i'm feeling inside, isn't obvious enough to be seen. cuz i don't want people to worry about me, since they've got too many troubles of their own. but i still need people to care. i know they do. thanks for that.
my final words.
no words of defeat, just a crushed heart beneath the strong exterior.
God, i know you're hearin me. I know you're here. come. now. before i fall apart beneath the every growing shadows of the darkness that i chose to fight for you. I need you now, more than ever before. i'm holding on to that shard of hope, the bleak light within the darkness.
As Dusk Falls
4/16/2007 10:21:00 PM
