i guess you could say that i lost my way, and now i've seen the light. the darkness is clearing, and the path that i must take, becoming clearer. i cannot continue on like this, a drifter. plainly just floating around everywhere, not taking ownership of anything for fear of responsibility and everything that comes with it. i must pick myself up. and the first step is awareness of your current plight.

thanks Vivian, bei er, without you, He couldn't have showed me what i'm doing now. i'm grateful to you for this. i know you'll continue to help me out where it's needed, after all, we do complete each other, where i'm lacking, you're not and vice versa. and yes, i do read your blog, in response to your blog post. haha.

i just thought i'd type it out before turning in. it's a good practice to jot down one's thoughts. thank you God, thanks Vivian. =)

i've had ups and downs this CNY. cuz it's coupled together(get it? coupled? tgt? HAHAHA) with Valentine's day. so all we chinese out there can call this one, Valentines day burn.....

on the first morning of the first day of chinese new year, already bad start. had a small lil' argument with my dad in the morning about going back to M'sia. you know i dislike going there. but i kinda found the reason after going in. thank God that He allowed me to see a different light this year. i don't know why, but it was just different.

aside from that. yes, Vivian, my dearest bei er, i really do miss you alot. hell, i don't even know how much is enough to describe to you this irritating feeling of missing you yet not being able to see you, contact you or even talk to you. Thank God again that He provided the internet connection over there at your aunt's place. haha.

CNY loot was good. now i have funds. hahaha. time to go on a long awaited good date with you. haha. waiting for awhile more to convert my RM into SGD, then go on a spree at China Square. lol. provided that i have stuff to spree on. not forgetting to save money. haha. aye. that's all for now.

this whole period has really allowed me to see how much we really love each other. hasn't it? it's good. it's like, He purposely did this so that we'd see it. so i'm thankful to Him. and also thankful to Him for keeping me and you safe, esp last night whr i almost fell sick. haha, after the tomyam fish and coke with chivas. haha. i know you'll probably hit me on the head after reading this. haha. but yea. love you Vivian.

for the other readers of this blog, my apologies. esp to Jasper and gang. i know you need not see all the written affection and etc. but whatever. haha. my bad. i really had to do it. haha. Happy CNY to the rest of ya. hope that you too shall have abundance of Red Packets which are fat with funds. haha.